What's in a Name?

It just occured to me that, if I was a rock star and had a band, I'd rather have a hardcore name than just use my own name (i.e. Kenny Loggins). Most bands will give you a story of where their name came from such as Led Zeppelin coming out of a conversation between band mates regarding specific names. It is said or rumored that drummer John Bonham replied that one specific name that came up during this conversation would go over like a led balloon and so they tweaked the name and became Led Zeppelin.

But mine would need a story and so I return to High School where fortuantely or unfortunately a great deal of my most embarrassing moments lie.

I just recently was speaking to a friend who reminded me of an event that I had long forgotten. It turns out that I had vandalized his car while he was running a track meet and the implications while not altogether important but alas they gave birth to my future band's name.

Like all good stories it was a dark and stormy night when I happened to be leaving another friend's house who lived nearby the track field where my friend Mike was running. So as I often did, I intended to stop by and hopefully catch a little bit of the action but when I arrived there was no parking. However I did see that Mike's car was parked along the street so I decided to leave him a note that I had been there and to call me later. When I arrived at the car it was open so I went to place the note inside and as I was doing so I noticed his track bag was lying on the seat of his car...Inside I found these contents: 3 pairs of tidy whities, 2 pairs of sneakers (presumably for sneaking), a jock strap (which I handled carefully with the pen I had brought to leave the note), & some T-shirts. Well, to me such a situation called for these items to be tossed haphazardly around the car leaving the jock strap to dangle off his rearview mirror.

Now as it turns out Mike was not Jewish but for some reason I thought it would be funnier to leave a threatening note than a boring "how do you do" type of greeting...and so I scribbled some hateful rhetoric telling him that I thought he and his kind should GET OUT. I had never drawn a swastika before but I thought that I ably captured the essence of it and left this note hanging off the pasenger seat visor and promptly ambled back to my car and sped off.

Well, it seems that Mike had some rituals that I didn't even know about, one of which was to drive to and from track meets with his coach. After the meet they returned to the car and saw the door partially open and general disarray inside the car (I forgot to mention that he had quite a few bags of fastfood waste lying on the backseat floor which was carefully redeposited on the front seats)...They began to clean the car out and it was obvious to Mike that this was the work of someone who knew him and he tried to explain that it was just a goof...this is when his coach found the letter hanging off the visor.

It turns out that I should have paid more attention to my first dabble in the field of Anti Semitism because apparently the swastika that I had drawn was inverted. Mike's coach only had one question and it was this, "who are you friends with Michael, dyslexic nazi's?"

...And so my band name was born...I can barely strum a guitar but at least I know that if by some chance lighting strikes me and I am graced with the talent to actually play that thing that sits in my basement looking cool...Hey, I have a good hardcore band name -

"Ladies & Gentlemen, may I introduce to you...The Dyslexic Nazis"

...This was originally posted 10/25/05 by one of the original Founding Fathers of The Aurora...none other than the Fly. Some say we booted him because he was a commie or maybe because he was the only one with any real talent, which may very well be true but the fact is he has moved on to greener pastures, as well as blue and orange pastures. I reprint this without permission and there aint a gosh dang thing he can do about it. --- donk.