However we refuse to be camel-toed as being just pseudo-serious journalists without a lighter side. As they say "all work and no play makes Jack want to kill his wife and son in a deserted snowbound hotel" so as promised we present to you a new parlour game section here at The Aurora titled... Donkey's Giant Hanging Fuzzy Dice (from the rearview mirror of your soul) Of The Week
Without further ado (gesundheit) we present you with THE BOX.
The first time I played this game was at the home of miladyfriend's friend with a few other couples, and a blast was had by all (the eight bottles of Chilean red might have had something to do with it). I bought the game the next day and have since bought three or four more(some as presents and some to replace my original after gifting them to guests) and like AXP I never leave home without it. I know what youre thinking, its just a box (hey I happen to like box) how is this going to change the face of parlour gamery as we in the civilized world now know it. Well Im glad you asked.
The genius lies in its simplicity. Its a box with nine numbered tiles and a set of wooden dice. You roll the dice and lay down any combination of tiles that match your roll, you continue rolling until you can no longer lay down any more tiles. If you can no longer lay down any tiles, the remaining tiles are your score, for example the above picture, the score is 13,689. The lower the score the better. Once you get to a point where the tiles add up to six or less, you only roll one die. Now heres the reason were all here. If you lay down all of the tiles, then you SHUT THE BOX (thats the name of the game) How you shut it is entirely up to you. Some people are gentle when they do it and some like to get rough and slam the box, but trust me when I say this...you will make much excitement when you do it (aint as easy as it looks)
Now for the good stuff, its origins are as a gambling game for pirates, seamen and other seafaring folk of the ports. As such, its preferred to play for money. The money must be placed within the box. A buck will do, but a fiver is my preferred denomination. Low score wins, and if you SHUT THE BOX then everyone pays you double. Being the degenerate that I am I have added a few craps inspired side bets. If someone does SHUT THE BOX with a hard way roll they win triple the original bet and if they SHUT THE BOX with a yo eleven (once once once) its triple plus one.
Thats pretty much it. The sexual innuendos are up to you (vulgarity is scored higher than creativity), but it definitely adds some spice to a social gathering when a normally reserved woman is screaming that she wants a hard eight (or ten or twelve) to slam the box.
Walk dont run to your nearest wooden pirate game retailer and buy this game.
EE-Aw!
10 comments:
Stop being a Brown noser.
That's cool, and do the people in Ohio play this crazy pirate box game?
Do people still play games that don't involve electronics? I thought i was the only one. I'm a big fan of Backgammon, and Risk. And i'm very good at both games. Risk is one of my all time favorites because i love taking over the world!
Big Risk fan myself, in fact I occasionaly play online with friends from my high school chess club.
Shut The Box is not a thinking mans game (although some strategy is involved, but not really) its the crack cocaine of dice games.
Reminds me of that line in dodgeball.
"it's called the freedom of information act kate. the hippies finally got something right"
"just kidding, but not really"
Know about it? I plan to unveil my highly anticipated Kamchatka Siamese twin dual pronged offensive!
But lets not get sidetracked, this post is about the BOX.
Speaking of which, where are all the female Aurorans?
Lurking, donkeyhue. Lurking.
To be quite honest, we ladies are just glad to see men shooting shit ABOUT boxes at all.
Boxes should be held in higher regard.
And its nice to see that not only do you make good use of them, but share the box with guests.
Don't forget to watch your fingers though. A slam might make you box-wary.
Oh- yeah. I recommend you listen to "Glory Box" when you play with the fem-folk. A soundtrack, if you will.
Ill consider your reco, as soon as I figure out who the hell sings it, if as I correctly? assume that it is a song.
...However I find that the screams and shouts, but especially the sweet sounds of victory of those playing with The Box is music enough to my ears
Parker Brothers ain't got shit on the Donkey!
Nor you my brother. Nor you. Word on the street is that you have multiple Boxes at home. Kudos!
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