Thursday, July 13, 2006

True Story

True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said,

"We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.


....and the moral of this story is


Always keep your condoms in the car

stolen from a Warlike email

8 comments:

Unknown said...

Ha Ha Ha, I love it. What a great post. This post proves that sometimes it pays to hit the "next blog" button from your own blogs tool bar.

Best,
Conor
www.conorjmurpy.blogspot.com

Mookie McFly said...

At one of my favorite Irish pubs, my Irish bartender is always starting his stories with, "and this is a true story." That is all I will say about that...Wait, no it isn't. What are these condoms that you speak of and in what way would they have helped you out with the younger sister?

anita said...

is that *really* a true story? obviously, i'm easily confused.

Mookie McFly said...

Half the way through I got concerned that it was a true story...but about me!

Warlike said...

Thanks for my shout out Donkey--Just like KFC stealing the recipe.

Anonymous said...

...and just like the white devil stealing peanut butter from Carver.

Ill rectify.

Warlike said...

no need playa--Enjoy your weekend with the trees

Lily said...

That WAS a great story. I missed you sick bastards. Like a moth to one of Donsky's inadequate Newark street lamps, I return. Like an idiot.

That was funny.