Jack Boy HillFriday, March 30, 2007
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Darwin Din't Get No Beaver
First off, I apologize for my photo editing skills in advance. Secondly, why is it that wacky guys in cartoons are always named Larry or Ralph?
Finally, I don't get it? Who wants a big hairy beaver for their birthday?
Sheer Profundity?
I know when I said, "finally" you'da (uh-oh there goes the grammar rodeo) hoped I'd just stop there. Alas I am very far from done.
Anyone who knows me knows that it's very hard for me to stay on point. They think I am just stupid or that I was probably dropped on my head while smoking a bong as a child.
They are only half right...
And in my opinion, Darwin's theory of evolution is probably only half right at best. No, I am not a creationist although I have been known to begatting down from time to time. No, it's because I don't think that humans are highly evolved. Who cares whether or not we came from apes, monkeys or chimps? How does that help us out today? Through natural selection humans have developed an opposable thumb and this makes us superior to monkeys? Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know we can talk. Christopher Walken in The Prophecy referred to man as talking monkeys. We wish... and monkeys everywhere were offended. They can swing in trees with their feet for crying out loud! But that is not my biggest problem with Darwin or Evolution.
My main problem is with the beaver.
Have you ever read or seen anything about this animal? They basically can live on land and in the water for the love of God (or Darwin, no offense Mr. & Mrs. Evolution...which is by the way a pretty great band name but I digress)! I can grip a hammer and hold a pen...they can cut down trees with their teeth! I'm sorry but they are far superior to humans and yet Darwin chose humans as his focus group. Talk about solipsism...Why do you think we give Beavers names like Bucky? It's because deep down inside we are all anti-evolutionites. We all know inside our highly evolved domes that regardless of whether God did it to us or our environment moved us precariously along towards our current state. We's sure did gets the short end of the stick so's tah' speak. The stick that a beaver makes far more productive use of than humans can and at a lower cost.
When people want to do construction, they go before zoning commissions and beg for variances that will allow for their precious structures to be built. When beavers want to build crap they just gnaw on some trees, knock shit down, slop mud on it and call it home. They don't care who's on the town council and they certainly don't send the mayor's wife a coupon for a free car wash. No, like Nike used to say, the beaver just do it. Beavers flood farmer's lands in this country more than American Idol sucks. Is Al Gore pissed about it? No, what can he do? They're freaking beavers and they do what they want when they want. Towns try to stop them by putting up barricades in front of sewage holes but beavers don't play. They usually find a way to get around these feebly archaic hindrances so they can build and grow their population. I don't know about you but just in case this global warming crap is true, my money would be on the beavers. I guarantee they get better odds in Vegas than man. Did I mention that they basically could live on land or in water? Meanwhile, some guy in Arkansas (or New Jersey) is picking his nose with his thumb, which is just a glorified finger.
Just one more thing on how I feel about beavers...
They rule.
Just one more thing on Darwin and evolution...
If beavers evolved from a lower species into their current awesomeness how come they don't get constantly compared to them? I mean how come we have to put up with being compared to monkeys who masturbate in public and fling poop while beavers just get to go around cutting down trees and screwing up our farmer's properties? Exactly...it's because if evolution holds any truth it's that beavers are the superior species.
PS - I hate people who get all sad when whales beach themselves. They're just trying to eat you, moron. Ask a seal or a walrus and they'd tell you...I dares ya' to ask 'em.
PSS - To the creationists in the crowd, riddle me this...On the first day, God said, "Let there be light." But then He waited until like the fourth day to create the sun, the moon and the stars. What was the light He created? I'm not trying to be obnoxious...I seriously want to know what theologically you think He did...Did God create Jesus on that first day or did He just create the idea of Jesus' light? Without the sun, the moon and the stars would there even be light?
Until Next Time:
Gun Control?
Why do you need to carry a gun when you have security guards and you live in a gated upscale community? Oh, you don't live there? Well sucks to be you then i guess....
"To preserve Liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them." (Richard Henry Lee, Virginia delegate to the Continental Congress, and member of the first Continental Congress, which passed the Bill of Rights)
Gun Control: Democrats are noticeably silent as freshman Sen. James Webb packs heat and leaves an aide literally holding the bag. So why should their constituents not have the same right to self-defense?
Link
"To preserve Liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them." (Richard Henry Lee, Virginia delegate to the Continental Congress, and member of the first Continental Congress, which passed the Bill of Rights)
Gun Control: Democrats are noticeably silent as freshman Sen. James Webb packs heat and leaves an aide literally holding the bag. So why should their constituents not have the same right to self-defense?
Link
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Solipsism
That's right, Solipsism! Look it up dummies! (i did)
"Gore and his followers seem to assume that the ideal climate was the one they got used to when they were growing up. When temperatures dropped in the 1970s, there were warnings of an impending ice age. When they rose in the 1990s, there were predictions of disastrous global warming. This is just another example of the solipsism of the baby boom generation, the pampered and much-praised age cohort that believes the world revolves around them and that all past history has become irrelevant."
Link
"Gore and his followers seem to assume that the ideal climate was the one they got used to when they were growing up. When temperatures dropped in the 1970s, there were warnings of an impending ice age. When they rose in the 1990s, there were predictions of disastrous global warming. This is just another example of the solipsism of the baby boom generation, the pampered and much-praised age cohort that believes the world revolves around them and that all past history has become irrelevant."
Link
You Down With The GC
Once again proving that the humanitarian anti-war left are neither humanitarians or anti-war, and that theirs is an ideology strictly contrarian to President George W. Bush as well as American and her allies interests.
More disturbing, but of no surprise, is the open support they demonstrate for our enemies, or as Laura Ingraham recently accused Alan Colmes, of "holding water for the mullahs".
How else can you explain their short term memory loss about their favorite legal document of the past five years, the Geneva Convention.
Speaking of which, allow me to go off topic for a moment.
It seems the black guys in my office call the white guys "GC's". Through the use of an informer it has been suggested that it is code for the good whiteys, but the rat is extremely unreliable and untrustworthy, as rats are wont to be, and grapevine activity implies a more sinister connotation. If anyone in Auroraland has heard of this term, a heads up would be appreciated, as I would not want to be outsmarted in the ethnic slur department by a bunch of canadians.
Back to the GC.
There was a time not so long ago when a day would not pass by without some lib citing the Geneva Convention ensuring that suspected terrorists in Gitmo received prayer mats and three square halal meals a day. Okay, that is fine if you want to a pusillanimous peacenik, that is your right, but at least be consistent.
Article 3
To this end the following acts are and shall remain prohibited at any time and in any place whatsoever with respect to the above-mentioned persons:
(b) Taking of hostages;
(c) Outrages upon personal dignity, in particular, humiliating and degrading treatment;
I shortened the above section of the GC to that which applies to the current Iran/Brit situation. I have scoured the liberal blogs, newspapers, cable news programs, and shockingly nary a word is being said condemning Iran's blatant violation of the Geneva Convention.
Where is the front page NY Times article demanding Red Cross access to the British sailors?
Where is Code Pink with their criticism of the bangersnmashless Iranian prisons?
Where is John Murtha and his comparisons of the Iranian Navy to the shanghai happy Barbary Pirates?
Oh yeah. They are too busy rooting against their country.
Where is the consistency in their arguments?
More disturbing, but of no surprise, is the open support they demonstrate for our enemies, or as Laura Ingraham recently accused Alan Colmes, of "holding water for the mullahs".
How else can you explain their short term memory loss about their favorite legal document of the past five years, the Geneva Convention.
Speaking of which, allow me to go off topic for a moment.
It seems the black guys in my office call the white guys "GC's". Through the use of an informer it has been suggested that it is code for the good whiteys, but the rat is extremely unreliable and untrustworthy, as rats are wont to be, and grapevine activity implies a more sinister connotation. If anyone in Auroraland has heard of this term, a heads up would be appreciated, as I would not want to be outsmarted in the ethnic slur department by a bunch of canadians.
Back to the GC.
There was a time not so long ago when a day would not pass by without some lib citing the Geneva Convention ensuring that suspected terrorists in Gitmo received prayer mats and three square halal meals a day. Okay, that is fine if you want to a pusillanimous peacenik, that is your right, but at least be consistent.
Article 3
To this end the following acts are and shall remain prohibited at any time and in any place whatsoever with respect to the above-mentioned persons:
(b) Taking of hostages;
(c) Outrages upon personal dignity, in particular, humiliating and degrading treatment;
I shortened the above section of the GC to that which applies to the current Iran/Brit situation. I have scoured the liberal blogs, newspapers, cable news programs, and shockingly nary a word is being said condemning Iran's blatant violation of the Geneva Convention.
Where is the front page NY Times article demanding Red Cross access to the British sailors?
Where is Code Pink with their criticism of the bangersnmashless Iranian prisons?
Where is John Murtha and his comparisons of the Iranian Navy to the shanghai happy Barbary Pirates?
Oh yeah. They are too busy rooting against their country.
Where is the consistency in their arguments?
Hay
A man walked into a bar in Louisville, Kentucky; and ordered a drink. While he was sitting at the bar watching TV, one of Hillary's political ads came on. After it went off, he stood up and announced to everyone, "Hillary is a horse's ass!"
The bartender reached under the bar and brought out an oak club about eighteen inches long and hit the man square across his jowls, knocking him off his stool and onto the floor.
After a minute, the man stood up, straightened himself up and said to the bartender, "I'm sorry, I didn't know this was Hillary country"
"It's not!" replied the bartender. "It's horse country"
The bartender reached under the bar and brought out an oak club about eighteen inches long and hit the man square across his jowls, knocking him off his stool and onto the floor.
After a minute, the man stood up, straightened himself up and said to the bartender, "I'm sorry, I didn't know this was Hillary country"
"It's not!" replied the bartender. "It's horse country"
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
It's Tax Season
So get ready for all the stories about the "tax cuts for the rich".
The only FAIR tax is a FLAT tax.
"Far from 'favoring the rich,' as many believe, our tax code is massively redistributionist, sending literally trillions of dollars into low-income homes and far less into wealthy homes. This may be good or bad, depending on your point of view, but the fact is it's happening. And those who argue that recent tax cuts 'benefit the rich' ignore the reality."
link
The only FAIR tax is a FLAT tax.
"Far from 'favoring the rich,' as many believe, our tax code is massively redistributionist, sending literally trillions of dollars into low-income homes and far less into wealthy homes. This may be good or bad, depending on your point of view, but the fact is it's happening. And those who argue that recent tax cuts 'benefit the rich' ignore the reality."
link
Flobble De Flee
Dennis Miller: And now here with a commentary is Grumpy Old Man! Welcome, Grumpy! [applause for Grumpy Old Man, an elderly, bespectacled, gray-haired man in a sweater]Grumpy Old Man: I'm oooooold! And I'm not happy! And I don't like things now compared to the way they used to be. All this progress -- phooey! In my day, we didn't have these cash machines that would give you money when you needed it. There was only one bank in each state -- it was open only one hour a year. And you'd get in line, seventeen miles long, and the line became an angry mob of people -- fornicators and thieves, mutant children and circus freaks -- and you waited for years and by the time you got to the teller, you were senile and arthritic and you couldn't remember your own name. You were born, got in line, and ya died! And that's the way it was and we liked it!
Life was simpler then. There wasn't all this concern about hy-giene! It my days, we didn't have Kleenex. When you turned seventeen, you were given the family handkerchief. ... It hadn't been washed in generations and it stood on its own ... filled with diseases and swarmin' with flies. ... If you tried to blow your nose, you'd get an infection and your head would swell up and turn green and children would burst into tears at the sight o' ya! And that's the way it was and we liked it!
Life was a carnival! We entertained ourselves! We didn't need moooovin' pitchurrrres. In my day, there was only one show in town -- it was called "Stare at the sun!" ... That's right! You'd sit in the middle of an open field and stare up at the sun till your eyeballs burst into flames! And you thought, "Oh, no! Maybe I shouldn't've stared directly into the burning sun with my eyes wide open." But it was too late! Your head was on fire and people were roastin' chickens over it. ... And that's the way it was and we liked it!
Progress?! Flobble-de-flee! In my day, when we were angry and frustrated, we just said, "Flobble-de-flee!" 'cause we were idiots and we didn't know what else to say! Just a bunch o' illiterate Cro-Magnons, blowin' on crusty handkerchiefs, waitin' in lines for our head to burst into flame and that's the way it was and we liked it!
Dennis Miller: Grumpy Old Man! Thank you, Grumpy! [applause, Dennis tries to shake Grumpy Old Man's hand but Grumpy Old Man is too ornery to shake anybody's hand, dadgummit]
Grumpy Old Man: Flobble-de-flee! [exits]
Headsup to the Fly for reminding me of this classic SNL character --donk.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Solar Eclipse Of The Facts
I will admit that I stole the title from IBD, but considering that they have stolen my research aka common sense observation that maybe just maybe the sun is to blame for the current warming cycle, I figure we are all square.
It seems there has been another revelation regarding mans here to now limited knowledge off the sun. Shockingly, light has been shone on the fact that the sun’s temperature is not a constant, directly resulting in a variation of earth’s temperature.
In layman’s terms, when the sun is hotter, the earth is hotter. Even a sixth grader could have told you that.
Speaking of the title, which truth be told is almost Aurorian in its slavishly devotion to pop culture and wittiness, in other words… pretty dumb. Maybe that is why I got a kick out of it, that and it reminded me of this Avis commercial that cracks me up every time I see it air.
Hippie-ocrisy
The one thing that always cracks me up about liberal save the world types is the blatant hypocrisy. Actually it's not really all that funny. In almost all cases they cause more harm than good, and I couldn't give two shits if their heart is in the right place, as the old saying goes since they are not a part of the solution...they are the problem.
Whether it be the animal rights hippie in their leather Birkenstocks (and Guatemalan sweat shop sweaters), the eco-warriors, such as a former good friend of mine that joined Earth First to "save the trees" only to drive spikes into them to harm/kill lumberjacks, the out of Iraq but into Darfur placards, the professional "No Blood For Oil" crowd showing up to rallys in SUV's, Bono and Gap stores spending twenty million marketing their (Red) campaign only to disperse two million in aid for African AIDS, the Earth Day marchers leaving litter in their wake, the upcoming Live Earth concert and its message and modus operandi of mass consumerism to fight global warming, and for that matter anything the Algorians say or do regarding global warming....
I really could go on all day, but Id like to address the best one Ive read so far. South Park has already dealt with the issue of the smugness of Prius drivers in an absolutely classic episode so I will keep it short. Well, it seems, that their smugness is undeserved....
"Feeling a bit smug about owning that hybrid? Better rein in that contempt for those who still drive primitive conventional cars. It seems that a Hummer is more ecologically friendly than a Prius."
cont'd
"Wait, it gets worse. These two hybrids don't deliver the fuel economy that the Environmental Protection Agency label promises. Anyone who has driven these cars, even if they baby them, can tell you they don't get the advertised fuel economy. A quick call to the EPA confirmed that their test procedure overstates the fuel economy of hybrids by about 15%, which is a significant margin of error."
cont'd
OOPS-Aw!!!
In accordance with these new findings, The Aurora, as always is willing to do our part to save the planet. So, if any hippie chicks out there really want to make a difference, we will gladly accept a Hummer from you.
EE-Aw!!!
Whether it be the animal rights hippie in their leather Birkenstocks (and Guatemalan sweat shop sweaters), the eco-warriors, such as a former good friend of mine that joined Earth First to "save the trees" only to drive spikes into them to harm/kill lumberjacks, the out of Iraq but into Darfur placards, the professional "No Blood For Oil" crowd showing up to rallys in SUV's, Bono and Gap stores spending twenty million marketing their (Red) campaign only to disperse two million in aid for African AIDS, the Earth Day marchers leaving litter in their wake, the upcoming Live Earth concert and its message and modus operandi of mass consumerism to fight global warming, and for that matter anything the Algorians say or do regarding global warming....
I really could go on all day, but Id like to address the best one Ive read so far. South Park has already dealt with the issue of the smugness of Prius drivers in an absolutely classic episode so I will keep it short. Well, it seems, that their smugness is undeserved....
"Feeling a bit smug about owning that hybrid? Better rein in that contempt for those who still drive primitive conventional cars. It seems that a Hummer is more ecologically friendly than a Prius."
cont'd
"Wait, it gets worse. These two hybrids don't deliver the fuel economy that the Environmental Protection Agency label promises. Anyone who has driven these cars, even if they baby them, can tell you they don't get the advertised fuel economy. A quick call to the EPA confirmed that their test procedure overstates the fuel economy of hybrids by about 15%, which is a significant margin of error."
cont'd
OOPS-Aw!!!
In accordance with these new findings, The Aurora, as always is willing to do our part to save the planet. So, if any hippie chicks out there really want to make a difference, we will gladly accept a Hummer from you.
EE-Aw!!!
Like We Said
I don't see the big deal.
The Aurora have long said that "scientists" have been turning people into to sheep for years, I just think that 15% is a low number.
story
The Aurora have long said that "scientists" have been turning people into to sheep for years, I just think that 15% is a low number.
story
Sunday, March 25, 2007
The Nile Is Just A River
I realize that I keep swearing off engaging the "global warming" debate, actually it is worse than you might think, as I have been making that statement for about twenty years now about various "end of the world" scenarios made by tree huggers. But I just cant help myself, its in my nature to throw the bullshit flag when I see flagrant fouls.
See Id consider myself an environmentalist, a conservationist, an all around outdoorsman if you will. My years living in New York City have diminished my time spent outside, but not my passion for it. I have become the proverbial weekend warrior, but that notwithstanding, the environment remains an issue dear to my heart and I remain active to this day in various organizations that I believe actually make a difference in a small way. As the hippie bumper sticker says, I try to act locally. I'm not trying to save the world, I just build and clean up trails.
I don't let political ideology get in the way, and some groups that I belong to are rife with your typical tree hugging granola munchers, which makes for some great debates. Well, not really as it seems that as soon as they exhaust themselves of their talking points about how man is evil, Exxon is evil, and how George Bush (or fill in the blank GOP) is evil... they don't have all that much too say. I'm used to the rhetoric, and it bores me, but it is more easily dismissed in person than online.
As I mentioned this is something that has been of interest to me since my teens. Like the old saying goes about how if you're not a liberal when you're young.... Well Ive never been a liberal, but like most young idealists, I wanted to save the world too. I just have always taken a more practical common sense approach to it. I walked the walk.
I have seen first hand how man can indeed harm the environment by witnessing Allied Chemical's illegal dumping in the Onondaga Lake or Love Canal (I actually used to throw some mean keggers in the empty houses) as just two examples and will readily admit that mankind needs to be a more responsible steward of our home.
But we are not killing the planet on a global scale, the end is not nigh, and we have not broken the thermostat in less than three hundred years since the Industrial Revolution. Al Gore and his cronies claim that thirteen of the hottest years have occurred in the past twenty years, fer fooks sake the planet is billions of years old, of which man has existed for just a few short ticks of the second hand, and to make that statement is nothing less than scaremongering.
It just doesn't add up, and that is why you only hear one side of the argument about the damage that man is causing and rarely hear from the alarmists about the certain contradictory facts such as the Little Ice Age, The Maunder Minimum, or....
.....Volcanic impact on the atmosphere
Soufriere Hills Volcano, Montserrat photos by donkeyhue
...and the obvious yet ignored impact of Solar Irradiance
Aurora Borealis photo by Senior Airman Joshua Strang
See Id consider myself an environmentalist, a conservationist, an all around outdoorsman if you will. My years living in New York City have diminished my time spent outside, but not my passion for it. I have become the proverbial weekend warrior, but that notwithstanding, the environment remains an issue dear to my heart and I remain active to this day in various organizations that I believe actually make a difference in a small way. As the hippie bumper sticker says, I try to act locally. I'm not trying to save the world, I just build and clean up trails.
I don't let political ideology get in the way, and some groups that I belong to are rife with your typical tree hugging granola munchers, which makes for some great debates. Well, not really as it seems that as soon as they exhaust themselves of their talking points about how man is evil, Exxon is evil, and how George Bush (or fill in the blank GOP) is evil... they don't have all that much too say. I'm used to the rhetoric, and it bores me, but it is more easily dismissed in person than online.
As I mentioned this is something that has been of interest to me since my teens. Like the old saying goes about how if you're not a liberal when you're young.... Well Ive never been a liberal, but like most young idealists, I wanted to save the world too. I just have always taken a more practical common sense approach to it. I walked the walk.
I have seen first hand how man can indeed harm the environment by witnessing Allied Chemical's illegal dumping in the Onondaga Lake or Love Canal (I actually used to throw some mean keggers in the empty houses) as just two examples and will readily admit that mankind needs to be a more responsible steward of our home.
But we are not killing the planet on a global scale, the end is not nigh, and we have not broken the thermostat in less than three hundred years since the Industrial Revolution. Al Gore and his cronies claim that thirteen of the hottest years have occurred in the past twenty years, fer fooks sake the planet is billions of years old, of which man has existed for just a few short ticks of the second hand, and to make that statement is nothing less than scaremongering.
It just doesn't add up, and that is why you only hear one side of the argument about the damage that man is causing and rarely hear from the alarmists about the certain contradictory facts such as the Little Ice Age, The Maunder Minimum, or....
.....Volcanic impact on the atmosphere
Soufriere Hills Volcano, Montserrat photos by donkeyhue
...and the obvious yet ignored impact of Solar Irradiance
Aurora Borealis photo by Senior Airman Joshua StrangThe alarmists do not want scientific debate or they would not be so adamant that the discussion is closed and label all those that disagree as deniers and skeptics. This is not how science works, this is how, yes, junk science works, and in a way religion. If you dont believe in man made global warming then you are going to hell.
They try to discredit those in opposition as monetary pawns of big oil without revealing their own vested financial stakes in the game. Granted, Big Oil has the most to lose, theoretically, but it is also true that the one world alarmists (yeah thats right one world alarmists, Ill get to that in another post) have the most to gain from doing the least.
If a man came knocking on my door telling me there was gold in my backyard, I might believe him, but if he was selling mining equipment as well, then Id slam the door with a quickness. That is in essence what the alarminsts are telling us, and the sheeple are buying it. Time to wake up and shut the door.
EE-Aw!!!
Friday, March 23, 2007
Deez
I like coconuts
You can break them open
They smell like ladies lying in the sun
-- Widespread Panic
"Where do I go to get my reputation back?"
Should Nifong be prosecuted? Can he be sued? What about the stripper? Shouldn't she have some price to pay?
The remaining charges against three Duke University lacrosse players originally indicted for rape may be dropped sometime within the next few days, according to a report.
The remaining charges against three Duke University lacrosse players originally indicted for rape may be dropped sometime within the next few days, according to a report.
What's Good for the Goose....
There's a highschool that has a "day of silence" to show solidarity with the gay students of the world.
Ummm.... Ok. I don't think the highschool administration should get involved in a political protest but maybe that's just my opininon.
Some of the students at this highschool believe that homosexuality is immoral and want to wear t-shirts with a message that says "be happy not gay" but the administration will not allow them to do so.
Now if they didn't allow either one i would have no problem with it, but...
Read it here:
Ummm.... Ok. I don't think the highschool administration should get involved in a political protest but maybe that's just my opininon.
Some of the students at this highschool believe that homosexuality is immoral and want to wear t-shirts with a message that says "be happy not gay" but the administration will not allow them to do so.
Now if they didn't allow either one i would have no problem with it, but...
Read it here:
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Shameless Plug
Its getting to be that time of year folks, and I'm not talkin' bout drunk driving and illegal fireworks. Its baseball season, and in accord, the esteemed Mookie McFly has reincarnated the much heralded but now defunct Subway Serial blog (it seems that Lincoln was right) but in a more partisan incarnation, blue and orange only.
Mets Three Times
(With Fly, its like going to a game with that guy from Goodfellas)
I'll be the resident Hot Dog And Beer critic. In essence be prepared for a lot of drunken rants, but baseball related, as opposed to the drivel you are used to here.
So swing on by and root root root for the home team.....
Bow Wow Wow Yippie Yo Yippie Shea
The late great Lefty Frizzel once sang a song about the "Cigarette and Coffee Blues", well if I were a honky tonk singer my version would be the "Stone Cold Dogs and Piss Warm Lites Blues".
As they say you cant learn the blues, you gotta live them, and anyone that's been to Opening Day at Shea in the past ten years knows exactly what I'm talking about.
Now I'm not gonna tell ya a story like Old Grandad did and tell you how I used to eat uncooked Sabretts and drank skunked Rheingold drafts back in the old timer days after walking to Flushing backwards and uphill in a blizzard -- and not only did I like it, hell I loved it.
I'm going to tell you a story about Aramark, ok maybe not so much tell a story as just say they suck ass. If competition does indeed breed excellence, then the opposite must be true and being awarded a no competition contract festers incompetence. Let's hope Citi is gastronomically more accommodating.
A lot of people more discerning than I may mock Shea, but I loved it the first time I walked in the place, and when the cop near our seats told me and the Fly that we should just start bringing in our own hooch....well, I don't think I have to tell y'all how much that meant to me, but suffice to say alot... not so much to trade my signed Gilkey bat.. but alot.
See where I grew up we didn't have the luxury of any big league teams, so by default I didn't have any big league teams that I rooted for all that much (mind you this was before ESPN). The nearest team growing up was the Syracuse Chiefs the AAA affiliate of the Blue Jays, but I never became a Jays fan as the only thing I hated more than Buffalo was Canada. I know I know.. they're pretty much the same thing. Point taken. I saw some pretty good ball players like Johnny O on their way up to the bigs, but more importantly for this discussion I ate a lot of hot dogs. A lot of them.
Some may not realize that the Syracuse area is a hotbed for hot dog cuisine, but I'm telling ya it is. Hot dogs and baseball went together like well -- hot dogs and baseball, and going to Chief games at the old MacArthur Stadium when they were winning, well -- you sure done did git your fill of both.
Like most minor league teams, it was all about the gimmicks and the Chiefs used to have one where if they won by two runs you got a BK burger after the game, but hot damn if they won by three+ runs your ticket stub was good for one "one and one" at Heid's of Liverpool -- the hot dog mecca of Central New York. A one and one is two dogs; a red (german) and a white (coney) on a double wide bun two slits on top. Perhaps the greatest dog creation ever. Strike that.... The Greatest Hot Dog Creation Ever!
I didn't even mind so much that they had a permaban of tomato products on their premises. I had to go raw dog -- no toppings. Because that is how I roll. Still do. Snoop Donkey Donk in the motherfuckin house.
For that I thank Heids and the historic Hoffman and Heinz feud that went back to the Hinterland for if not for that I might have had a propensity to "drown my food" against the best wishes of School House Rock....
"I'm Louis the Lifeguard and happy to say / I rescued a drowning potato today! / They drowned it in sour cream, oh, what a shame / 'Cause food's so much better when it's practically plain!"
....and I would not not be the dog connoisseur that I am today.
After just one bite, not only can I tell you what brand and style the dog is, but what plant it was processed in, what day of the week it was packaged, and whether or not the pig was in fact happy rolling around in mud before their selfless sacrifice.
Ok all that might be a bunch of malarkey, but suffice it to say I know my dogs.
On that note and now that I have established my credentials I would like to announce an ongoing series of this blog... "The Dugout Dog Shout Out" which in cooperation with the Queens College Physics Department we will be formulating a direct correlation between the quality of Shea Dogs on gameday with the Mets performance on that given day. For all you stat heads out there; I promise you wont be disappointed, as rumor has it, we're even going to be using calculators.
Tick tock April 9th is coming so bring on them piss warm beers and ice cold dogs but more importantly .....
Let's Go Mets!!!
originally published at Mets Three Times
Mets Three Times
(With Fly, its like going to a game with that guy from Goodfellas)
I'll be the resident Hot Dog And Beer critic. In essence be prepared for a lot of drunken rants, but baseball related, as opposed to the drivel you are used to here.
So swing on by and root root root for the home team.....
Bow Wow Wow Yippie Yo Yippie Shea
The late great Lefty Frizzel once sang a song about the "Cigarette and Coffee Blues", well if I were a honky tonk singer my version would be the "Stone Cold Dogs and Piss Warm Lites Blues".
As they say you cant learn the blues, you gotta live them, and anyone that's been to Opening Day at Shea in the past ten years knows exactly what I'm talking about.
Now I'm not gonna tell ya a story like Old Grandad did and tell you how I used to eat uncooked Sabretts and drank skunked Rheingold drafts back in the old timer days after walking to Flushing backwards and uphill in a blizzard -- and not only did I like it, hell I loved it.
I'm going to tell you a story about Aramark, ok maybe not so much tell a story as just say they suck ass. If competition does indeed breed excellence, then the opposite must be true and being awarded a no competition contract festers incompetence. Let's hope Citi is gastronomically more accommodating.
A lot of people more discerning than I may mock Shea, but I loved it the first time I walked in the place, and when the cop near our seats told me and the Fly that we should just start bringing in our own hooch....well, I don't think I have to tell y'all how much that meant to me, but suffice to say alot... not so much to trade my signed Gilkey bat.. but alot.
See where I grew up we didn't have the luxury of any big league teams, so by default I didn't have any big league teams that I rooted for all that much (mind you this was before ESPN). The nearest team growing up was the Syracuse Chiefs the AAA affiliate of the Blue Jays, but I never became a Jays fan as the only thing I hated more than Buffalo was Canada. I know I know.. they're pretty much the same thing. Point taken. I saw some pretty good ball players like Johnny O on their way up to the bigs, but more importantly for this discussion I ate a lot of hot dogs. A lot of them.
Some may not realize that the Syracuse area is a hotbed for hot dog cuisine, but I'm telling ya it is. Hot dogs and baseball went together like well -- hot dogs and baseball, and going to Chief games at the old MacArthur Stadium when they were winning, well -- you sure done did git your fill of both.
Like most minor league teams, it was all about the gimmicks and the Chiefs used to have one where if they won by two runs you got a BK burger after the game, but hot damn if they won by three+ runs your ticket stub was good for one "one and one" at Heid's of Liverpool -- the hot dog mecca of Central New York. A one and one is two dogs; a red (german) and a white (coney) on a double wide bun two slits on top. Perhaps the greatest dog creation ever. Strike that.... The Greatest Hot Dog Creation Ever!
I didn't even mind so much that they had a permaban of tomato products on their premises. I had to go raw dog -- no toppings. Because that is how I roll. Still do. Snoop Donkey Donk in the motherfuckin house.
For that I thank Heids and the historic Hoffman and Heinz feud that went back to the Hinterland for if not for that I might have had a propensity to "drown my food" against the best wishes of School House Rock....
"I'm Louis the Lifeguard and happy to say / I rescued a drowning potato today! / They drowned it in sour cream, oh, what a shame / 'Cause food's so much better when it's practically plain!"
....and I would not not be the dog connoisseur that I am today.
After just one bite, not only can I tell you what brand and style the dog is, but what plant it was processed in, what day of the week it was packaged, and whether or not the pig was in fact happy rolling around in mud before their selfless sacrifice.
Ok all that might be a bunch of malarkey, but suffice it to say I know my dogs.
On that note and now that I have established my credentials I would like to announce an ongoing series of this blog... "The Dugout Dog Shout Out" which in cooperation with the Queens College Physics Department we will be formulating a direct correlation between the quality of Shea Dogs on gameday with the Mets performance on that given day. For all you stat heads out there; I promise you wont be disappointed, as rumor has it, we're even going to be using calculators.
Tick tock April 9th is coming so bring on them piss warm beers and ice cold dogs but more importantly .....
Let's Go Mets!!!
originally published at Mets Three Times
The Great Late Night In The Sky
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I remember being a fan of Late Night With David Letterman, before even watching an episode. My Granny D warned me that Letterman was the devil and that I should avoid watching him if I wanted to go to heaven.Needless to say, I didnt miss a show for the next few years.
Calvert DeForest the actor who played the half-witted but loveable Larry Melman, has passed.
Godspeed Bud, godspeed.
Corey Hart Was A Prophet
Well it seems that NASA is a reader of The Aurora as well. I just wonder what took them so long to publish our studies aka common sense observations.
Now where the frick is our grant money.
This is just so ridiculous it just might make sense. The Sun, of all things might actually impact global temperature? Say it ain't so. I haven't heard of any scientific consensus regarding this theory on Good Morning America, Al Gore sure hasn't mentioned it, and in fact there are rumors that The Sun may have received funding from Exxon in the past.
The UN (and for that matter, darn near pretty much every scientific report you have read preaching the sky is falling) agrees; that is, that the Sun has no impact on global temperature, and that is why in every single one of their climate studies warning of imminent atmospheric doom, they have failed to account for its affect, and yet the sheep of the world still take them seriously.
That makes sense.
Reminds me of my favorite "research" discovery of all time....
"Happy people smile more than people that are not happy"
Then again maybe they just have gas.
Of course the sun impacts global warming
you frickin jackasses!
Do we have to spell out everything.
EE-Aw!
Now where the frick is our grant money.
This is just so ridiculous it just might make sense. The Sun, of all things might actually impact global temperature? Say it ain't so. I haven't heard of any scientific consensus regarding this theory on Good Morning America, Al Gore sure hasn't mentioned it, and in fact there are rumors that The Sun may have received funding from Exxon in the past.
The UN (and for that matter, darn near pretty much every scientific report you have read preaching the sky is falling) agrees; that is, that the Sun has no impact on global temperature, and that is why in every single one of their climate studies warning of imminent atmospheric doom, they have failed to account for its affect, and yet the sheep of the world still take them seriously.
That makes sense.
Reminds me of my favorite "research" discovery of all time....
"Happy people smile more than people that are not happy"
Then again maybe they just have gas.
Of course the sun impacts global warming
you frickin jackasses!
Do we have to spell out everything.
EE-Aw!
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Algoraphobia
"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary."
-- H.L. Mencken
and to paraphrase hlm.....
Global warming is also a form of worship. The worship of scaremongers by sheep.
-- donk.
-- H.L. Mencken
and to paraphrase hlm.....
Global warming is also a form of worship. The worship of scaremongers by sheep.
-- donk.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
But Anyways....
I will gladly have you know that I am safely and some what soberly back from my trip, and if I must say, looking damn tan and handsome. Which brings me to the concept of conceit, or as some would say the reason that foreigners do not like us Americans...arrogance. That is right Mr World Man, we are arrogant.
After spending my mornings diving the depths with the hawk bill turtle and barracudas amongst the spectacularly misnamed common sea fans then later hiking (the hills were alive, with the sound of donkey) to heights with the likes of the Montserrat Oriole and the elusive Mountain Chicken, I would find myself, as I would o
n most nights at home I suppose, belly up to a bar with a cold beer and a hot plate of the aforementioned mountain "chicken"; and to a man, as is our wont, I invariably would turn my attention away from The Box to the tele and watch whatever game was on; in this case, the game being cricket, as the World Cup is currently taking place on various rocks throughout the Caribbean.
I can say confidently and with conviction that I now fully comprehend the game of cricket, and even after extensive discussions with locals and expats alike how baseball is a derivative of cricket, I still think it is pretty gay.
Although I almost always leave New York Donkey behind once I hit international waters, and transform into my alter ego... Friendly Donkey; at this point the Arrogant American in me kicked in.
I kindly and charismatically pointed out that although it may be true that cricket is the inspiration for America's Pastime, it's also true that like most things, it took American ingenuity to perfect it. In this case a game that required minimal athletic ability in its original incarnation (case in point Irelands historic upset over power Pakistan on St Paddys) and sometimes takes three days to complete what us yanks, or better yet, us Mets, can do bigger faster and stronger in less than four hours. In other words... cricket is pretty gay.
I then threw a hundo on the bar and bought the rum shop a round for my rudeness.
When asked if I had anything smaller.
I explained that in America a hundred is small.
EE-Aw!
After spending my mornings diving the depths with the hawk bill turtle and barracudas amongst the spectacularly misnamed common sea fans then later hiking (the hills were alive, with the sound of donkey) to heights with the likes of the Montserrat Oriole and the elusive Mountain Chicken, I would find myself, as I would on most nights at home I suppose, belly up to a bar with a cold beer and a hot plate of the aforementioned mountain "chicken"; and to a man, as is our wont, I invariably would turn my attention away from The Box to the tele and watch whatever game was on; in this case, the game being cricket, as the World Cup is currently taking place on various rocks throughout the Caribbean.I can say confidently and with conviction that I now fully comprehend the game of cricket, and even after extensive discussions with locals and expats alike how baseball is a derivative of cricket, I still think it is pretty gay.
Although I almost always leave New York Donkey behind once I hit international waters, and transform into my alter ego... Friendly Donkey; at this point the Arrogant American in me kicked in.
I kindly and charismatically pointed out that although it may be true that cricket is the inspiration for America's Pastime, it's also true that like most things, it took American ingenuity to perfect it. In this case a game that required minimal athletic ability in its original incarnation (case in point Irelands historic upset over power Pakistan on St Paddys) and sometimes takes three days to complete what us yanks, or better yet, us Mets, can do bigger faster and stronger in less than four hours. In other words... cricket is pretty gay.
I then threw a hundo on the bar and bought the rum shop a round for my rudeness.
When asked if I had anything smaller.
I explained that in America a hundred is small.
EE-Aw!
Is It Hot In Here?
Or is it the way you calculate the temperature?
He explains that while it is possible to treat temperature statistically locally, it is meaningless to talk about a a global temperature for Earth. The Globe consists of a huge number of components which one cannot just add up and average. That would correspond to calculating the average phone number in the phone book. That is meaningless.
Continued
He explains that while it is possible to treat temperature statistically locally, it is meaningless to talk about a a global temperature for Earth. The Globe consists of a huge number of components which one cannot just add up and average. That would correspond to calculating the average phone number in the phone book. That is meaningless.
Continued
Immigration
I have said in the past that the most important issue in the presidential race of '08 will be illegal immigration. In fact, The Aurora has done numerous posts on the subject and now that the campaign season has started (very early) we're starting to see that we have been on point from the very begining.
Iraq, and the war on terror in general are huge issues but the lines have already been drawn on that issue. The democrats will call for surrender, and the republicans will preach victory if they want their respective parties nomination. So that's been settled.
Illegal immigration will be the deciding factor, and the nominee who is the strongest on that issue will win the White House. These idiots in Washington have no idea what the average American is thinking, but they're starting to find out now.
On Saturday morning in Des Moines, Mr. Brownback stood for 30 minutes at a breakfast with Republicans as question after question — without exception — was directed at an immigration system that Iowans denounced as failing. “These people are stealing from us,” said Larry Smith, a factory owner from Truro and a member of the central committee of the state Republican Party.
Finally, Mr. Brownback, with a slight smile, inquired, “Any other topics that people want to talk about?”
Continued
Iraq, and the war on terror in general are huge issues but the lines have already been drawn on that issue. The democrats will call for surrender, and the republicans will preach victory if they want their respective parties nomination. So that's been settled.
Illegal immigration will be the deciding factor, and the nominee who is the strongest on that issue will win the White House. These idiots in Washington have no idea what the average American is thinking, but they're starting to find out now.
On Saturday morning in Des Moines, Mr. Brownback stood for 30 minutes at a breakfast with Republicans as question after question — without exception — was directed at an immigration system that Iowans denounced as failing. “These people are stealing from us,” said Larry Smith, a factory owner from Truro and a member of the central committee of the state Republican Party.
Finally, Mr. Brownback, with a slight smile, inquired, “Any other topics that people want to talk about?”
Continued
Monday, March 19, 2007
1984
Not that i'm endorsing Obama over Hillary, or the other way around for that matter, but this video is pretty cool.
CHECK IT OUT
CHECK IT OUT
Friday, March 16, 2007
Kent State and The Klan
I can't wait to see how this plays out. For those of you who are unaware, Kent State was in the news recently for having a radical muslim professor who advocated jihad against "non-believers" and of course Kent State defended him because it's free speech.
Well now we find out they have a professor who runs a website called "Kill the Negroes"! Well, that's free speech too. I wonder how this will be handled in the media? This could get good.
Well now we find out they have a professor who runs a website called "Kill the Negroes"! Well, that's free speech too. I wonder how this will be handled in the media? This could get good.
If At First..
You don't get Rove or Cheney for nothing with the Libby/Plame affair, go after them again with another non scandal involving the attorney general!
Move over, Watergate. There’s a big new scandal in America. The impeachment of a president? That’s child’s play compared to this biggie.
In fact, to read today’s papers, all the political controversies in our nation’s history combined don’t add up to the earthquake of a scandal that is rocking our world: the Bush Administration was involved in the firing of eight U.S. attorneys.
Continued
Move over, Watergate. There’s a big new scandal in America. The impeachment of a president? That’s child’s play compared to this biggie.
In fact, to read today’s papers, all the political controversies in our nation’s history combined don’t add up to the earthquake of a scandal that is rocking our world: the Bush Administration was involved in the firing of eight U.S. attorneys.
Continued
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Donkey Day
To paraphrase a Phillipino friend of The Aurora that we call Yellow...Once you go Irish you go back to Black. Good thing then that Ive got both covered as my ancestoral lineage is of dirty shanty bog dwelling donkeys also known as The Black Irish. There is alot of speculation and debate as to what exactly that term means; is it the Spanish influence or perhaps the line from The Commitments alluding to the Irish as the blacks of Europe. Who knows for certain.
Well I am a big fan of rice and beans and anyone that knows me knows that I am a natural born athlete but perhaps more telling is the fact that you and I both know I am a phenomenal dancer.
That is why I'm heading (I'm probably already there and drunk if you're reading this, then again what else is new) to the Black Irish capital of the world for the weekend; the Emerald Isle of the Caribbean...Montserrat, to get in touch with my roots (and escape all the drunken jackasses in NYC).
I could go on about how the diving is unrivaled, the hiking unspoiled and ramble on about all the historic cultural and scientific reasons for the trip but Ill be honest the main reason is that its the only country besides Ireland that celebrates St Paddys as a national holiday so in other words I'm just gonna be a drunk white guy in a Hawaiian shirt getting hopped up on Carib beers as far away from Fifth Ave as I can get, because if you got to know the truth; I cant stand the frickin Irish.
....and with a three to one exchange rate on the dollar (and beers) its worth risking a fiery death in a volcanic eruption.
Happy St Padraig's Aurorans!
Interesting ethnic slur fact: Montserrat supplied the British Navy with the produce to fight of scurvy which resulted in the Brits being known as "limeys"
Well I am a big fan of rice and beans and anyone that knows me knows that I am a natural born athlete but perhaps more telling is the fact that you and I both know I am a phenomenal dancer.
That is why I'm heading (I'm probably already there and drunk if you're reading this, then again what else is new) to the Black Irish capital of the world for the weekend; the Emerald Isle of the Caribbean...Montserrat, to get in touch with my roots (and escape all the drunken jackasses in NYC).
I could go on about how the diving is unrivaled, the hiking unspoiled and ramble on about all the historic cultural and scientific reasons for the trip but Ill be honest the main reason is that its the only country besides Ireland that celebrates St Paddys as a national holiday so in other words I'm just gonna be a drunk white guy in a Hawaiian shirt getting hopped up on Carib beers as far away from Fifth Ave as I can get, because if you got to know the truth; I cant stand the frickin Irish.
....and with a three to one exchange rate on the dollar (and beers) its worth risking a fiery death in a volcanic eruption.
Happy St Padraig's Aurorans!
Interesting ethnic slur fact: Montserrat supplied the British Navy with the produce to fight of scurvy which resulted in the Brits being known as "limeys"
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
I'm A Believer
Ok maybe I'm not really a true believer just yet as I still think it is junk science and just a theory, and even if you can make the argument that it is the best theory out there; a theory it is none the less.
Global warming? Shut yo mouth. That has pretty much already been scientifically disproven. Well that is it has for all of us with our heads outside of Al Gore's ass. I don't care what the one world globalist alarmist sycophantic "scientists" say..... I will not buy into a nitrogen-oxygen rich atmosphere being dominated dictated and destroyed by POINT ZERO FOUR PERCENT of carbon. Does it have some impact, well of course it does, but to insinuate that mankind in his few short ticks on the clock since the industrial revolution will destroy the atmosphere is downright ludicrous. Now that is fuzzy math.
As Tracy Chapman sang... don't you know I'm talkin' about evolution. Lets just say that my ideology has adapted and I have seen the light with my own two highly evolved eyes. Ok maybe not really as I still think it doesn't explain how we got here, but suffice it to say I am willing to give it the benefit of the doubt on how we'll, or should I say some of us, shall leave.
By SETH BORENSTEIN
"The harmful effects of global warming on daily life are already showing up, and within a couple of decades hundreds of millions of people won't have enough water, top scientists will say next month at a meeting in Belgium.
At the same time, tens of millions of others will be flooded out of their homes each year as the Earth reels from rising temperatures and sea levels, according to portions of a draft of an international scientific report obtained by The Associated Press.
Tropical diseases like malaria (they've heard of ddt right? - donk.) will spread. By 2050, polar bears (they know they can swim right? - donk.) will mostly be found in zoos, their habitats gone. Pests like fire ants will thrive."
cont'd
Back to the theory of evolution, well for now I'm gonna buy into some of it; primarily the idea of survival of the fittest or natural selection if you will. This frickin' planet needs a good thinning out. As Og Mandino told me... "I am not a sheep waiting to be prodded by my shepherd. I am a lion (and donkey) and I refuse to talk, to walk, to sleep with the sheep. The slaughterhouse of failure is not my destiny." and to paraphrase John McLauglin......Baaah bye sheeple.
In other words. If it is Armageddon then ....BRING IT ON!!!
I like my chances.
EE-Aw!!!
...And about that whole "running out of water" thing (but aren't the polar caps melting?). Yeah about that, its amazing what private enterprise can do when they want and need to without gov't interference. Good thing Ive got a guy in Dubai.
H2O acheivements
more
Global warming? Shut yo mouth. That has pretty much already been scientifically disproven. Well that is it has for all of us with our heads outside of Al Gore's ass. I don't care what the one world globalist alarmist sycophantic "scientists" say..... I will not buy into a nitrogen-oxygen rich atmosphere being dominated dictated and destroyed by POINT ZERO FOUR PERCENT of carbon. Does it have some impact, well of course it does, but to insinuate that mankind in his few short ticks on the clock since the industrial revolution will destroy the atmosphere is downright ludicrous. Now that is fuzzy math.
As Tracy Chapman sang... don't you know I'm talkin' about evolution. Lets just say that my ideology has adapted and I have seen the light with my own two highly evolved eyes. Ok maybe not really as I still think it doesn't explain how we got here, but suffice it to say I am willing to give it the benefit of the doubt on how we'll, or should I say some of us, shall leave.
By SETH BORENSTEIN
"The harmful effects of global warming on daily life are already showing up, and within a couple of decades hundreds of millions of people won't have enough water, top scientists will say next month at a meeting in Belgium.
At the same time, tens of millions of others will be flooded out of their homes each year as the Earth reels from rising temperatures and sea levels, according to portions of a draft of an international scientific report obtained by The Associated Press.
Tropical diseases like malaria (they've heard of ddt right? - donk.) will spread. By 2050, polar bears (they know they can swim right? - donk.) will mostly be found in zoos, their habitats gone. Pests like fire ants will thrive."
cont'd
Back to the theory of evolution, well for now I'm gonna buy into some of it; primarily the idea of survival of the fittest or natural selection if you will. This frickin' planet needs a good thinning out. As Og Mandino told me... "I am not a sheep waiting to be prodded by my shepherd. I am a lion (and donkey) and I refuse to talk, to walk, to sleep with the sheep. The slaughterhouse of failure is not my destiny." and to paraphrase John McLauglin......Baaah bye sheeple.
In other words. If it is Armageddon then ....BRING IT ON!!!
I like my chances.
EE-Aw!!!
...And about that whole "running out of water" thing (but aren't the polar caps melting?). Yeah about that, its amazing what private enterprise can do when they want and need to without gov't interference. Good thing Ive got a guy in Dubai.
H2O acheivements
more
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
The Other Four Letter Word
An early Paddy's Day joke. I had to correct the spelling of Jamisons. Stupid Irish (prob. written by a jew or a drunk mick) It has since been replaced with a more appropriate whiskey--donk.
One day an Irishman, who had been stranded on a deserted island for more than 10 years, saw a speck on the horizon. He thought to himself, "It's certainly not a ship." And, as the speck got closer and closer, he began to rule out the possibilities of a small boat and even a raft.
Suddenly there emerged from the surf a wet-suited black clad figure. Putting aside the scuba gear and the top of the wet suit, there stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde!
The glamorous blonde strode up to the stunned Irishman and said to him,
"Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a good cigar."
"Ten years," replied the amazed Irishman.
With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof pocket on the left sleeve of her wetsuit and pulled out a fresh package of cigars.
He takes one, lights it, and takes a long drag. "I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke can be!"
"And how long has it been since you've had a wee drop of Tulla?" asked the blonde.
The castaway replied, "Ten years the same."
Hearing that, the blonde reaches over to her right sleeve, unzips a pocket there and removes a flask and hands it to him. He opened the flask and took a long drink.
"'Nectar of the Gods!" stated the Irishman.
At this point the gorgeous blonde started to slowly unzip the long front of her wet suit, right down the middle. She looked at the Irishman and asked, "And how long has it been since you played around?"
The Irishman jumped for joy with excitement, "Jesus, Mary and Joseph! ....Don't tell me that you've got golf clubs in there, too!"
One day an Irishman, who had been stranded on a deserted island for more than 10 years, saw a speck on the horizon. He thought to himself, "It's certainly not a ship." And, as the speck got closer and closer, he began to rule out the possibilities of a small boat and even a raft.
Suddenly there emerged from the surf a wet-suited black clad figure. Putting aside the scuba gear and the top of the wet suit, there stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde!
The glamorous blonde strode up to the stunned Irishman and said to him,
"Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a good cigar."
"Ten years," replied the amazed Irishman.
With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof pocket on the left sleeve of her wetsuit and pulled out a fresh package of cigars.
He takes one, lights it, and takes a long drag. "I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke can be!"
"And how long has it been since you've had a wee drop of Tulla?" asked the blonde.
The castaway replied, "Ten years the same."
Hearing that, the blonde reaches over to her right sleeve, unzips a pocket there and removes a flask and hands it to him. He opened the flask and took a long drink.
"'Nectar of the Gods!" stated the Irishman.
At this point the gorgeous blonde started to slowly unzip the long front of her wet suit, right down the middle. She looked at the Irishman and asked, "And how long has it been since you played around?"
The Irishman jumped for joy with excitement, "Jesus, Mary and Joseph! ....Don't tell me that you've got golf clubs in there, too!"
....and there it is
So not only is she running as the first woman President, the second black President, and the second Catholic President, but shes got something else up her sleeve.
I think shes got the electorate pegged.
Hillary knows damn well what shes doing. By bringing up the VRWC she understands that she will be admonished for her previous erroneous accusation, but more importantly shes understands the American Idol and Spuds McKenzie electorate. Sex sells as they say on Mad.
She remembers Jennifer Flowers. She remembers that her husband banged a fat intern and in the corporate world would have been fired for sexual harassment. She remembers looking straight into the camera and lying to the American public.
She remembers the poll numbers*.
She's not running as anything that I mentioned above.
She remembers the oldest victim trick in the liberal playbook.
She's now running as the first desperate housewife to be elected President.
I think shes got the electorate pegged.
Hillary knows damn well what shes doing. By bringing up the VRWC she understands that she will be admonished for her previous erroneous accusation, but more importantly shes understands the American Idol and Spuds McKenzie electorate. Sex sells as they say on Mad.
She remembers Jennifer Flowers. She remembers that her husband banged a fat intern and in the corporate world would have been fired for sexual harassment. She remembers looking straight into the camera and lying to the American public.
She remembers the poll numbers*.
She's not running as anything that I mentioned above.
She remembers the oldest victim trick in the liberal playbook.
She's now running as the first desperate housewife to be elected President.
Yeah that's right Hillary, like a tract of land in a Monty Python movie it is VAST(close enough)
..and effective (the truth can be that)
We'll leave the tire slashing for you krazy kos kids.
Now what.
EE-Aw!
link
*only problem is that everybodys Qualcomm stock isnt splitting four for one every other week these days, so they might be paying slightly more attention this time around.
..and effective (the truth can be that)
We'll leave the tire slashing for you krazy kos kids.
Now what.
EE-Aw!
link
*only problem is that everybodys Qualcomm stock isnt splitting four for one every other week these days, so they might be paying slightly more attention this time around.
Its Duncan Hunter's Peanut Butter Now Biotch
I’ve never read the following commentator before but I couldn't agree more. If the conservative movement needs to take two steps backwards in ’08 and suffer the consequences of a democrat White House then so be it. I won’t like it but we will have no one to blame but ourselves. It is imperative that we first reclaim our soul before we even deserve the right to take that next step forward.
Lao-tsu once said that a journey of a thousand miles begins with just one step. Well if that step means a Hillary presidency, well then once again we will have no one to blame but ourselves. I would have thought that losing Congress in '06 was enough of a wake-up call, apparently I was wrong.
Like John Henry before me Id rather die swinging with a hammer in my hand then to betray my conscience and vote for the likes of a Guiliani or McClain, and I like Rudy; in fact I think he’d make a great Secretary of State, just not President. I will not be railroaded into voting for a candidate that is not the best man for the job, in other words.... a conservative.
The stakes are bigger than the White House, the future of the Republican Party is at risk.
If the dems can turn Hillary into a drawlin' Southerner in a NY Yankee hat who was both a Goldwater girl while marching with MLK, an alum of schools that discriminated against Catholics yet now is the new JFK.... well then we can make Duncan Hunter the next President of the United States of America.
EE-Aw!
Mychal Massie
GOP leaders: Don't 'Bob Dole' us again
Posted: March 13, 2007
1:00 a.m. Eastern
""[The] "Hustle" may have been a line dance we did back in the days of disco, but today it's what GOP leadership and a complicit media are trying to do to the voters responsible for the Republican Party's successes since Ronald Reagan.
Realistic chances of winning notwithstanding, there are no fewer than 13 Republicans in the contest for the 2008 presidential sweepstakes. But to hear party leadership and the media spin promote the candidates, one easily gets the impression that John McCain, Rudy Giuliani and Mitt Romney are not just the only candidates, but that McCain and Romney are the opening act for Giuliani as he awaits his coronation.
This is a ruse, a con, and in brief, an attempt to hustle the voters. GOP leadership is trying to "Bob Dole" us. They have, in effect, met in the smoke-filled back room of a private club and decided amongst themselves who they want in 2008. Their problem is how to deceive the voters into believing that said pick is of the voters' choosing.
Their solution: hand pick the candidate, truncate the primaries, shove the candidate down our collective throats vis-Ã -vis the media's promoting, interviewing and discussing (ad nauseum) McCain, Romney and Giuliani, but in such a way as to always have Giuliani shine brighter. Then, when he has garnered the nomination, we the voters will be told, "Yes, it is true he is a little more moderate than we may like," but if we don't vote for him, Hillary will win and hell will freeze over.
To which, allowing that same has no basis in theological truth, I respond, "If there be a hell on earth, and it freezes over because I vote my conscience and Hillary wins, I'll walk on ice until the party lets the voters truly have a say."
Now, my scenario may not be completely accurate, but you can bet I'm not far off base. One thing is for certain – of the 13 Republican candidates, only three of them are being touted – and don't tell me it's the fault of the other candidates, because a week ago this same media (Fox News included) was trying to convince us that the corpse of Anna Nicole Smith was newsworthy.""
cont'd
Lao-tsu once said that a journey of a thousand miles begins with just one step. Well if that step means a Hillary presidency, well then once again we will have no one to blame but ourselves. I would have thought that losing Congress in '06 was enough of a wake-up call, apparently I was wrong.
Like John Henry before me Id rather die swinging with a hammer in my hand then to betray my conscience and vote for the likes of a Guiliani or McClain, and I like Rudy; in fact I think he’d make a great Secretary of State, just not President. I will not be railroaded into voting for a candidate that is not the best man for the job, in other words.... a conservative.
The stakes are bigger than the White House, the future of the Republican Party is at risk.
If the dems can turn Hillary into a drawlin' Southerner in a NY Yankee hat who was both a Goldwater girl while marching with MLK, an alum of schools that discriminated against Catholics yet now is the new JFK.... well then we can make Duncan Hunter the next President of the United States of America.
EE-Aw!
Mychal MassieGOP leaders: Don't 'Bob Dole' us again
Posted: March 13, 2007
1:00 a.m. Eastern
""[The] "Hustle" may have been a line dance we did back in the days of disco, but today it's what GOP leadership and a complicit media are trying to do to the voters responsible for the Republican Party's successes since Ronald Reagan.
Realistic chances of winning notwithstanding, there are no fewer than 13 Republicans in the contest for the 2008 presidential sweepstakes. But to hear party leadership and the media spin promote the candidates, one easily gets the impression that John McCain, Rudy Giuliani and Mitt Romney are not just the only candidates, but that McCain and Romney are the opening act for Giuliani as he awaits his coronation.
This is a ruse, a con, and in brief, an attempt to hustle the voters. GOP leadership is trying to "Bob Dole" us. They have, in effect, met in the smoke-filled back room of a private club and decided amongst themselves who they want in 2008. Their problem is how to deceive the voters into believing that said pick is of the voters' choosing.
Their solution: hand pick the candidate, truncate the primaries, shove the candidate down our collective throats vis-Ã -vis the media's promoting, interviewing and discussing (ad nauseum) McCain, Romney and Giuliani, but in such a way as to always have Giuliani shine brighter. Then, when he has garnered the nomination, we the voters will be told, "Yes, it is true he is a little more moderate than we may like," but if we don't vote for him, Hillary will win and hell will freeze over.
To which, allowing that same has no basis in theological truth, I respond, "If there be a hell on earth, and it freezes over because I vote my conscience and Hillary wins, I'll walk on ice until the party lets the voters truly have a say."
Now, my scenario may not be completely accurate, but you can bet I'm not far off base. One thing is for certain – of the 13 Republican candidates, only three of them are being touted – and don't tell me it's the fault of the other candidates, because a week ago this same media (Fox News included) was trying to convince us that the corpse of Anna Nicole Smith was newsworthy.""
cont'd
Amazing
I first hear it as I’m coming out of a turn on the track at the University of Pretoria’s High Performance Centre. It’s 100 meters to the finish line. I’m pumping my legs as fast as I can when a sort of snick snick snick snick starts getting louder, like I’m being chased by a giant pair of scissors.
LINK
LINK
Dennis The Menace
for eb....
"The cancellation in the past two days of two planned nationally televised debates because of candidates’ “scheduling conflicts” and unwillingness to participate smacks of “manipulation by some candidates who would rather run and hide than defend their records and their positions on the war,” Ohio Congressman and Democratic Presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich said today while campaigning in Texas.
Kucinich said “it’s an insult to the voters, and the height of cynicism, for candidates to refuse to take the public stage and subject themselves to public scrutiny.”
link
That is probably the first and will most definitely be the last time I ever quote Kucinich, but he's right on this one, insofar as to call out his fellow dems as pusillanimous chumps. Frank the Tank would not approve...THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DEBATE.
Enough of this nonsense realitytvification of the electoral process. That's why The Aurora endorses Newt's Pledge Plan... Relax Niedermeyer I said Plan.
The "Nine Nineties in Nine" Pledge
"If you believe, as I do, that there is an opportunity for a better political dialogue now and in 2008, then I need your help. I issued a challenge at Cooper Union to those who are running for president asking them to take a pledge which can be summarized as follows.
"If I receive my party's nomination for President of the United States, I pledge to participate in nine, ninety-minute dialogues in the nine weeks before the general election with my opponent. In the Lincoln-Douglas style, I will agree to debate my opponent with only a time-keeper, and to insist upon no rules. I understand it will be just me and my solutions and my opponent with theirs."
link
"The cancellation in the past two days of two planned nationally televised debates because of candidates’ “scheduling conflicts” and unwillingness to participate smacks of “manipulation by some candidates who would rather run and hide than defend their records and their positions on the war,” Ohio Congressman and Democratic Presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich said today while campaigning in Texas.
Kucinich said “it’s an insult to the voters, and the height of cynicism, for candidates to refuse to take the public stage and subject themselves to public scrutiny.”
link
That is probably the first and will most definitely be the last time I ever quote Kucinich, but he's right on this one, insofar as to call out his fellow dems as pusillanimous chumps. Frank the Tank would not approve...THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DEBATE.
Enough of this nonsense realitytvification of the electoral process. That's why The Aurora endorses Newt's Pledge Plan... Relax Niedermeyer I said Plan.
The "Nine Nineties in Nine" Pledge
"If you believe, as I do, that there is an opportunity for a better political dialogue now and in 2008, then I need your help. I issued a challenge at Cooper Union to those who are running for president asking them to take a pledge which can be summarized as follows.
"If I receive my party's nomination for President of the United States, I pledge to participate in nine, ninety-minute dialogues in the nine weeks before the general election with my opponent. In the Lincoln-Douglas style, I will agree to debate my opponent with only a time-keeper, and to insist upon no rules. I understand it will be just me and my solutions and my opponent with theirs."
link
Monday, March 12, 2007
Halliburton We Have A Problem
Now Im getting po'd. First Newt, Buchanan next, then Coulter and now Marketwatch.com is biting my material.
Halliburton's guy in Dubai
....reads the headline. I will have you know that The Aurora although not an "individual" enjoys legal juristic status and is fully copyrighted. We have rights damn it. So stop being a slave to a page in my rhyme book.
Ive long used the line that I have "a guy in Dubai" because well I do. The Donkeyhue (actually its the Mc side not the O's) Clan runs deep in the Middle East and they are constantly trying to recruit me to go work with them. Its not as easy an offer to turn down as it may seem.
They grossly overpay, there is no income tax, the strip clubs are jam packed with Ruskies and Ethiopians (big fan of half moon cookies), and its always sunny; but on the downside its also always sunny to the tune of a hundo plus degrees, the booze laws are needless to say... prohibitive (apparently they give non-citizens a pseudo-debit card allowing you to purchase x amount of alcohol per week/ month, and once that's done well you're done) but more importantly its the Middle East even if it is just good ol friendly Dubai. With my mouth and temperament, you'd see me on CNN within a week in an orange jumpsuit trying to headbutt some camel banging terrorist with my lifeless bloody Ichibod Crane torso.
Which brings me to Halliburton. I don't care if they are relocating to Dubai, I ain't happy with it but its their right as a corporate entity. However just as I opposed the ports deal I oppose this in the sense that all military and security sensitive contracts should be rendered null and void immediately and any and all tax breaks abolished upon their incorporation in the UAE. If they want to get all french toast on us; well that's fine, but certain business should be handled exclusively by American corporations. Period. I understand that Dubai are our "allies" but if we cant trust them to price check ships in our docks then they cant run our military support efforts either says I.
...and that's that.
EE-Aw!
Halliburton's guy in Dubai
....reads the headline. I will have you know that The Aurora although not an "individual" enjoys legal juristic status and is fully copyrighted. We have rights damn it. So stop being a slave to a page in my rhyme book.
Ive long used the line that I have "a guy in Dubai" because well I do. The Donkeyhue (actually its the Mc side not the O's) Clan runs deep in the Middle East and they are constantly trying to recruit me to go work with them. Its not as easy an offer to turn down as it may seem.
They grossly overpay, there is no income tax, the strip clubs are jam packed with Ruskies and Ethiopians (big fan of half moon cookies), and its always sunny; but on the downside its also always sunny to the tune of a hundo plus degrees, the booze laws are needless to say... prohibitive (apparently they give non-citizens a pseudo-debit card allowing you to purchase x amount of alcohol per week/ month, and once that's done well you're done) but more importantly its the Middle East even if it is just good ol friendly Dubai. With my mouth and temperament, you'd see me on CNN within a week in an orange jumpsuit trying to headbutt some camel banging terrorist with my lifeless bloody Ichibod Crane torso.
Which brings me to Halliburton. I don't care if they are relocating to Dubai, I ain't happy with it but its their right as a corporate entity. However just as I opposed the ports deal I oppose this in the sense that all military and security sensitive contracts should be rendered null and void immediately and any and all tax breaks abolished upon their incorporation in the UAE. If they want to get all french toast on us; well that's fine, but certain business should be handled exclusively by American corporations. Period. I understand that Dubai are our "allies" but if we cant trust them to price check ships in our docks then they cant run our military support efforts either says I.
...and that's that.
EE-Aw!
They Just Come Here For Work
At least that's what the ILLEGAL immigrant lobby wants you to believe, but we know better don't we?
The review will continue, and officials expect during the first year to identify 700 to 800 gang members who are illegal immigrants, according to Jim Hayes, director of the Los Angeles field office for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement.
I think that number is very conservative. In fact P Buchanan notes in his book that the number of Mexican street gangs in Los Angeles is so huge that the bloods and the crips are uniting in order to combat them.
The focus on immigration status comes as the city of Los Angeles is calling on federal agencies to help it crack down in response to last year's 15.7% increase in gang crime.
The review will continue, and officials expect during the first year to identify 700 to 800 gang members who are illegal immigrants, according to Jim Hayes, director of the Los Angeles field office for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement.
I think that number is very conservative. In fact P Buchanan notes in his book that the number of Mexican street gangs in Los Angeles is so huge that the bloods and the crips are uniting in order to combat them.
The focus on immigration status comes as the city of Los Angeles is calling on federal agencies to help it crack down in response to last year's 15.7% increase in gang crime.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Senators Snowe and Rockefeller Hate America
...and the Constitution
...and Capitalism
...and well you get the idea.
EE-Aw!
"It gets even stranger. Snowe and Rockefeller are particularly upset that ExxonMobil has funded groups that publish views about climate science on "non-peer-reviewed websites such as Tech Central Station." Snowe and Rockefeller have also published viewpoints on climate change on their own websites. Are their websites "peer reviewed"?
U.S. citizens have a right to discuss global warming and climate policy even if they are not scientists. Snowe and Rockefeller imply that speech about global warming and climate policy is illegitimate unless conducted within the pages of scientific journals such as Science or Nature, or unless it uncritically parrots the editorial policies of such journals.
This kind of elitism—the notion that the lay public should just defer to its betters and never question the pronouncements of scientific experts—may have its aficionados in the Royal Society, but it has no place except parody in American politics."
mo'
...and Capitalism
...and well you get the idea.
EE-Aw!
"It gets even stranger. Snowe and Rockefeller are particularly upset that ExxonMobil has funded groups that publish views about climate science on "non-peer-reviewed websites such as Tech Central Station." Snowe and Rockefeller have also published viewpoints on climate change on their own websites. Are their websites "peer reviewed"?
U.S. citizens have a right to discuss global warming and climate policy even if they are not scientists. Snowe and Rockefeller imply that speech about global warming and climate policy is illegitimate unless conducted within the pages of scientific journals such as Science or Nature, or unless it uncritically parrots the editorial policies of such journals.
This kind of elitism—the notion that the lay public should just defer to its betters and never question the pronouncements of scientific experts—may have its aficionados in the Royal Society, but it has no place except parody in American politics."
mo'
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Shaving Freud
LEADER OF AL QAIDA GROUP IN IRAQ 'CAPTURED'...
Atlanta Lab Claims AIDS Vaccine Nearing Reality...
Unemployment Rate Drops to 4.5%...
INSURGENCY STRIKES 'DOWN 80%'...
Sex offender guilty in rape, murder of Florida child...
All good news. The democrats must be pissed.
EE-Aw!
...all headlines culled from Drudge
Atlanta Lab Claims AIDS Vaccine Nearing Reality...
Unemployment Rate Drops to 4.5%...
INSURGENCY STRIKES 'DOWN 80%'...
Sex offender guilty in rape, murder of Florida child...
All good news. The democrats must be pissed.
EE-Aw!
...all headlines culled from Drudge
Friday, March 09, 2007
Climate Catastrophe Averted
We're gonna... We're all gonna...
We're all gonna live!
"The average temperature in February 2007 was 32.9 F. This was -1.8 F cooler than the 1901-2000 (20th century) average, the 34th coolest February in 113 years. The temperature trend for the period of record (1895 to present) is 0.3 degrees Fahrenheit per decade."
link
We're all gonna live!
"The average temperature in February 2007 was 32.9 F. This was -1.8 F cooler than the 1901-2000 (20th century) average, the 34th coolest February in 113 years. The temperature trend for the period of record (1895 to present) is 0.3 degrees Fahrenheit per decade."
link
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Bust A Cap In Your Green Ass
I'm curious as to whether the fact that now that the carbon shell game is in and of itself becoming "big business", not unlike say an "Exxon" -- do the greenies lose their credibility too and more importantly the moral high ground?
Ha ha very funny Dr Jones.
EE-Aw!
Cap and Charade
The political and business self-interest behind carbon limits.
Saturday, March 3, 2007 12:01 a.m. EST
The idea of a cap-and-trade system for limiting carbon-dioxide emissions in the U.S. has become all the rage. Earlier this year, 10 big American companies formed the Climate Action Partnership to lobby for government action on climate change. And this week the private-equity consortium that is bidding to take over Texas utility TXU announced that, as part of the buyout, it would join the forces lobbying for a cap on carbon emissions.
cont'd
Ha ha very funny Dr Jones.
EE-Aw!
Cap and Charade
The political and business self-interest behind carbon limits.
Saturday, March 3, 2007 12:01 a.m. EST
The idea of a cap-and-trade system for limiting carbon-dioxide emissions in the U.S. has become all the rage. Earlier this year, 10 big American companies formed the Climate Action Partnership to lobby for government action on climate change. And this week the private-equity consortium that is bidding to take over Texas utility TXU announced that, as part of the buyout, it would join the forces lobbying for a cap on carbon emissions.
cont'd
It Aint Easy Being GOPeezy
I just said it ....
However, she says it better, so I'm reprinting this in its entirety without permission although I will put forth the offer of remuneration in the form of dinner for two at Luger's.
EE-Aw!
SHOOTING ELEPHANTS IN A BARREL
Wed Mar 7, 6:41 PM ET
Lewis Libby has now been found guilty of perjury and obstruction of justice for lies that had absolutely no legal consequence.
It was not a crime to reveal Valerie Plame's name because she was not a covert agent. If it had been a crime, Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald could have wrapped up his investigation with an indictment of the State Department's Richard Armitage on the first day of his investigation since it was Armitage who revealed her name and Fitzgerald knew it.
With no crime to investigate, Fitzgerald pursued a pointless investigation into nothing, getting a lot of White House officials to make statements under oath and hoping some of their recollections would end up conflicting with other witness recollections, so he could charge some Republican with "perjury" and enjoy the fawning media attention.
As a result, Libby is now a convicted felon for having a faulty memory of the person who first told him that Joe Wilson (news, bio, voting record) was a delusional boob who lied about his wife sending him to Niger.
This makes it official: It's illegal to be Republican.
Since Teddy Kennedy walked away from a dead girl with only a wrist slap (which was knocked down to a mild talking-to, plus time served: zero), Democrats have apparently become a protected class in America, immune from criminal prosecution no matter what they do.
As a result, Democrats have run wild, accepting bribes, destroying classified information, lying under oath, molesting interns, driving under the influence, obstructing justice and engaging in sex with underage girls, among other things.
Meanwhile, conservatives of any importance constantly have to spend millions of dollars defending themselves from utterly frivolous criminal prosecutions. Everything is illegal, but only Republicans get prosecuted.
Conservative radio personality Rush Limbaugh was subjected to a three-year criminal investigation for allegedly buying prescription drugs illegally to treat chronic back pain. Despite the witch-hunt, Democrat prosecutor Barry E. Krischer never turned up a crime.
Even if he had, to quote liberal Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz: "Generally, people who illegally buy prescription drugs are not prosecuted." Unless they're Republicans.
The vindictive prosecution of Limbaugh finally ended last year with a plea bargain in which Limbaugh did not admit guilt. Gosh, don't you feel safer now? I know I do.
In another prescription drug case with a different result, last year, Rep. Patrick Kennedy (news, bio, voting record) (Democrat), apparently high as a kite on prescription drugs, crashed a car on Capitol Hill at 3 a.m. That's abuse of prescription drugs (BEGIN ITAS) plus a DUI offense. Result: no charges whatsoever and one day of press on Fox News Channel.
I suppose one could argue those were different jurisdictions. How about the same jurisdiction?
In 2006, Democrat and major Clinton contributor Jeffrey Epstein was nabbed in Palm Beach in a massive police investigation into his hiring of local underage schoolgirls for sex, which I'm told used to be a violation of some kind of statute in the Palm Beach area.
The police presented Limbaugh prosecutor Krischer with boatloads of evidence, including the videotaped statements of five of Epstein's alleged victims, the procurer of the girls for Epstein and 16 other witnesses.
But the same prosecutor who spent three years maniacally investigating Limbaugh's alleged misuse of back-pain pills refused to bring statutory rape charges against a Clinton contributor. Enraging the police, who had spent months on the investigation, Krischer let Epstein off after a few hours on a single count of solicitation of prostitution. The Clinton supporter walked, and his victims were branded as whores.
The Republican former House Whip Tom DeLay is currently under indictment for a minor campaign finance violation. Democratic prosecutor Ronnie Earle had to empanel six grand juries before he could find one to indict DeLay on these pathetic charges -- and this is in Austin, Texas (the Upper West Side with better-looking people).
That final grand jury was so eager to indict DeLay that it indicted him on one charge that was not even a crime -- and which has since been tossed out by the courts.
After winning his primary despite the indictment, DeLay decided to withdraw from the race rather than campaign under a cloud of suspicion, and Republicans lost one of their strongest champions in Congress.
Compare DeLay's case with that of Rep. William "The Refrigerator" Jefferson, Democrat. Two years ago, an FBI investigation caught Jefferson on videotape taking $100,000 in bribe money. When the FBI searched Jefferson's house, they found $90,000 in cash stuffed in his freezer. Two people have already pleaded guilty to paying Jefferson the bribe money.
Two years later, Bush's Justice Department still has taken no action against Jefferson. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (news, bio, voting record) recently put Rep. William Jefferson (news, bio, voting record) on the Homeland Security Committee.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (news, bio, voting record), Democrat, engaged in a complicated land swindle, buying a parcel of land for $400,000 and selling it for over $1 million a few years later. (At least it wasn't cattle futures!)
Reid also received more than four times as much money from Jack Abramoff (nearly $70,000) as Tom DeLay ($15,000). DeLay returned the money; Reid refuses to do so. Why should he? He's a Democrat.
Former Clinton national security adviser Sandy Berger literally received a sentence of community service for stuffing classified national security documents in his pants and then destroying them -- big, fat federal felonies.
But Scooter Libby is facing real prison time for forgetting who told him about some bozo's wife.
Bill Clinton was not even prosecuted for obstruction of justice offenses so egregious that the entire Supreme Court staged a historic boycott of his State of the Union address in 2000.
By contrast, Linda Tripp, whose only mistake was befriending the office hosebag and then declining to perjure herself, spent millions on lawyers to defend a harassment prosecution based on far-fetched interpretations of state wiretapping laws.
Liberal law professors currently warning about the "high price" of pursuing terrorists under the Patriot Act had nothing but blood lust for Tripp one year after Clinton was impeached (Steven Lubet, "Linda Tripp Deserves to be Prosecuted," New York Times, 8/25/99).
Criminal prosecution is a surrogate for political warfare, but in this war, Republicans are gutless appeasers.
Bush has got to pardon Libby.
Ann Coulter
However, she says it better, so I'm reprinting this in its entirety without permission although I will put forth the offer of remuneration in the form of dinner for two at Luger's.
EE-Aw!
SHOOTING ELEPHANTS IN A BARREL
Wed Mar 7, 6:41 PM ET
Lewis Libby has now been found guilty of perjury and obstruction of justice for lies that had absolutely no legal consequence.
It was not a crime to reveal Valerie Plame's name because she was not a covert agent. If it had been a crime, Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald could have wrapped up his investigation with an indictment of the State Department's Richard Armitage on the first day of his investigation since it was Armitage who revealed her name and Fitzgerald knew it.
With no crime to investigate, Fitzgerald pursued a pointless investigation into nothing, getting a lot of White House officials to make statements under oath and hoping some of their recollections would end up conflicting with other witness recollections, so he could charge some Republican with "perjury" and enjoy the fawning media attention.
As a result, Libby is now a convicted felon for having a faulty memory of the person who first told him that Joe Wilson (news, bio, voting record) was a delusional boob who lied about his wife sending him to Niger.
This makes it official: It's illegal to be Republican.
Since Teddy Kennedy walked away from a dead girl with only a wrist slap (which was knocked down to a mild talking-to, plus time served: zero), Democrats have apparently become a protected class in America, immune from criminal prosecution no matter what they do.
As a result, Democrats have run wild, accepting bribes, destroying classified information, lying under oath, molesting interns, driving under the influence, obstructing justice and engaging in sex with underage girls, among other things.
Meanwhile, conservatives of any importance constantly have to spend millions of dollars defending themselves from utterly frivolous criminal prosecutions. Everything is illegal, but only Republicans get prosecuted.
Conservative radio personality Rush Limbaugh was subjected to a three-year criminal investigation for allegedly buying prescription drugs illegally to treat chronic back pain. Despite the witch-hunt, Democrat prosecutor Barry E. Krischer never turned up a crime.
Even if he had, to quote liberal Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz: "Generally, people who illegally buy prescription drugs are not prosecuted." Unless they're Republicans.
The vindictive prosecution of Limbaugh finally ended last year with a plea bargain in which Limbaugh did not admit guilt. Gosh, don't you feel safer now? I know I do.
In another prescription drug case with a different result, last year, Rep. Patrick Kennedy (news, bio, voting record) (Democrat), apparently high as a kite on prescription drugs, crashed a car on Capitol Hill at 3 a.m. That's abuse of prescription drugs (BEGIN ITAS) plus a DUI offense. Result: no charges whatsoever and one day of press on Fox News Channel.
I suppose one could argue those were different jurisdictions. How about the same jurisdiction?
In 2006, Democrat and major Clinton contributor Jeffrey Epstein was nabbed in Palm Beach in a massive police investigation into his hiring of local underage schoolgirls for sex, which I'm told used to be a violation of some kind of statute in the Palm Beach area.
The police presented Limbaugh prosecutor Krischer with boatloads of evidence, including the videotaped statements of five of Epstein's alleged victims, the procurer of the girls for Epstein and 16 other witnesses.
But the same prosecutor who spent three years maniacally investigating Limbaugh's alleged misuse of back-pain pills refused to bring statutory rape charges against a Clinton contributor. Enraging the police, who had spent months on the investigation, Krischer let Epstein off after a few hours on a single count of solicitation of prostitution. The Clinton supporter walked, and his victims were branded as whores.
The Republican former House Whip Tom DeLay is currently under indictment for a minor campaign finance violation. Democratic prosecutor Ronnie Earle had to empanel six grand juries before he could find one to indict DeLay on these pathetic charges -- and this is in Austin, Texas (the Upper West Side with better-looking people).
That final grand jury was so eager to indict DeLay that it indicted him on one charge that was not even a crime -- and which has since been tossed out by the courts.
After winning his primary despite the indictment, DeLay decided to withdraw from the race rather than campaign under a cloud of suspicion, and Republicans lost one of their strongest champions in Congress.
Compare DeLay's case with that of Rep. William "The Refrigerator" Jefferson, Democrat. Two years ago, an FBI investigation caught Jefferson on videotape taking $100,000 in bribe money. When the FBI searched Jefferson's house, they found $90,000 in cash stuffed in his freezer. Two people have already pleaded guilty to paying Jefferson the bribe money.
Two years later, Bush's Justice Department still has taken no action against Jefferson. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (news, bio, voting record) recently put Rep. William Jefferson (news, bio, voting record) on the Homeland Security Committee.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (news, bio, voting record), Democrat, engaged in a complicated land swindle, buying a parcel of land for $400,000 and selling it for over $1 million a few years later. (At least it wasn't cattle futures!)
Reid also received more than four times as much money from Jack Abramoff (nearly $70,000) as Tom DeLay ($15,000). DeLay returned the money; Reid refuses to do so. Why should he? He's a Democrat.
Former Clinton national security adviser Sandy Berger literally received a sentence of community service for stuffing classified national security documents in his pants and then destroying them -- big, fat federal felonies.
But Scooter Libby is facing real prison time for forgetting who told him about some bozo's wife.
Bill Clinton was not even prosecuted for obstruction of justice offenses so egregious that the entire Supreme Court staged a historic boycott of his State of the Union address in 2000.
By contrast, Linda Tripp, whose only mistake was befriending the office hosebag and then declining to perjure herself, spent millions on lawyers to defend a harassment prosecution based on far-fetched interpretations of state wiretapping laws.
Liberal law professors currently warning about the "high price" of pursuing terrorists under the Patriot Act had nothing but blood lust for Tripp one year after Clinton was impeached (Steven Lubet, "Linda Tripp Deserves to be Prosecuted," New York Times, 8/25/99).
Criminal prosecution is a surrogate for political warfare, but in this war, Republicans are gutless appeasers.
Bush has got to pardon Libby.
Ann Coulter
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
There's This One Kid We Call Him Mongo
Late last year The Aurora proposed that if the surge were to work it would not be a result of the numbers increase but rather the change in tactics. I even went so far as to suggest that we should throw on grass kilts and do the Mongolian Hula upside their domes.
I'm speaking about Hulagu Khan (shut yer mouth) -- the last successful foreign invader of Baghdad and grandson of the great Khan himself; no not Chaka, Chaka, Chaka Khan but Chinggis "Of The Eternal Blue Heaven" Khan.
I made the point that Hulagu would wall in the cities that he was sieging, and Baghdad was no exception. He then would take it a step further and divert the local river, in this case the Tigris flooding out the enemy's stronghold. Not to mention using local peasants as cannon fodder. It was a brilliant tactic, although now labelled as ruthless it was quite revolutionary at the time. More importantly... it worked.
Now I wouldn't go that far, ok maybe I would, but I did suggest that walling in the insurgents in trouble spots would be a good start. Containment is key.
Well it looks like someone at the Pentagon was reading The Aurora.
"Haditha, like Barwanah and Haglaniyah -- the other two towns in the triad -- is surrounded by a dirt berm topped with concertina wire and guards. There are two tightly controlled entrances, and no cars are allowed to drive in the town proper." 1
..and it looks like its working.
"Progress in security is verifiable. In the first week after the 2/3 took over Haditha there were 22 attacks in the town. That's down to one or two attacks a week since the clearing operation." 2
The Aurora Plan...getting results
EE-Aw!
I'm speaking about Hulagu Khan (shut yer mouth) -- the last successful foreign invader of Baghdad and grandson of the great Khan himself; no not Chaka, Chaka, Chaka Khan but Chinggis "Of The Eternal Blue Heaven" Khan.
I made the point that Hulagu would wall in the cities that he was sieging, and Baghdad was no exception. He then would take it a step further and divert the local river, in this case the Tigris flooding out the enemy's stronghold. Not to mention using local peasants as cannon fodder. It was a brilliant tactic, although now labelled as ruthless it was quite revolutionary at the time. More importantly... it worked.
Now I wouldn't go that far, ok maybe I would, but I did suggest that walling in the insurgents in trouble spots would be a good start. Containment is key.
Well it looks like someone at the Pentagon was reading The Aurora.
"Haditha, like Barwanah and Haglaniyah -- the other two towns in the triad -- is surrounded by a dirt berm topped with concertina wire and guards. There are two tightly controlled entrances, and no cars are allowed to drive in the town proper." 1
..and it looks like its working.
"Progress in security is verifiable. In the first week after the 2/3 took over Haditha there were 22 attacks in the town. That's down to one or two attacks a week since the clearing operation." 2
The Aurora Plan...getting results
EE-Aw!
There's a word for this — hypocrisy
And i think stupidity works in that spot too.
Speaking of carbon offsets and shell games, guess where Gore buys his carbon offsets?
Speaking of carbon offsets and shell games, guess where Gore buys his carbon offsets?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Live From The Beautiful Downtown Aurora
There's an old movie called "Butterflies Are Free". Ill be honest I cant really tell you what it was about except that a young Goldie Hawn was in her bra and panties pretty much for the entire movie. What's my point? Well I don't really have one, just wanted to put forth the visual of a young Goldie Hawn in her bra and panties, a visual that should be noted that as a teen -- served me well during those cold Upstate winters; who am I kidding -- they served me well during those cold Upstate summers as well.
Considering that I was born in the Burbank Community Hospital, I would have been remiss to not take her advice and "sock it to myself" if you catch my drift.
Now how's that for a visual.
Well if they remade the movie today, the title would be "Celebs And Libs Go Free", for when was the last time you can remember either that were convicted of a crime? They all walk. Martha doesn't count because although she might be a lib and a celeb, her crime involved the evil stock market which trumps them all.
Kill a white woman and jewish dude... have a nice day
Molest a child... can I get an autograph
Get caught with 90k of marked bribe money in your freezer....
Kill your mistress....
Run a gay underage brothel.....
Drunk drive down a one way street....
....Welcome to the Democratic Caucus (and/or the Kennedy Clan)
I can remember the one time that I was called for jury duty. I could hear my number being scratched off by the defense before I even sat down at the same time the saliva of the prosecutor was flooding the courtroom floor.
I was fortunate enough to have been involved in a knife fight (twas just a flesh wound) back when I was a wild colonial boy as the case involved a stabbing so I was immediately dismissed (with half a sawbuck in my pocket for my time)
It wouldn't have mattered anyways as anyone that's ever served knows its the riff raff that are unable or unwilling to get out of it. I know riff raff, riff raff was a good friend of mine, donkey you are no riff raff.
but....
The jury system is not flawed, the values system of America is flawed. Make a billion dollars in Hollywood and you're a hero, but don't you dare earn a million bucks on Wall Street because you must have did so at the expense of the poor and the oppressed you capitalist pig... now give it back so we can create a larger welfare state.
Scooter was found guilty because Tim Russert (a lib and a celeb) was found to have been more credible (of course he was, hes on TV). He was found guilty of having a bad memory. Now don't get me wrong. Scooter called Joe Wilson out, he intentionally emasculated him by pointing out that it was his wife that sent him to Niger for groceries. He did not blow Plame's cover as she was not a noc, nor was she in the past five years. Her role with the CIA was an open secret in Washington (and the cover of Vanity Fair) I will even go so far to admit that there's no doubt the orders came from the top, and that Cheney barked them... but once again no crime was committed.
Today's ruling was a travesty...but came as no great surprise. My legal advice to any conservative out there awaiting trial is simple; hire an agent, get some head shots taken and most importantly.... get thee to a reality show and register as a democrat.
EE-Aw!
Considering that I was born in the Burbank Community Hospital, I would have been remiss to not take her advice and "sock it to myself" if you catch my drift.
Now how's that for a visual.
Well if they remade the movie today, the title would be "Celebs And Libs Go Free", for when was the last time you can remember either that were convicted of a crime? They all walk. Martha doesn't count because although she might be a lib and a celeb, her crime involved the evil stock market which trumps them all.
Kill a white woman and jewish dude... have a nice day
Molest a child... can I get an autograph
Get caught with 90k of marked bribe money in your freezer....
Kill your mistress....
Run a gay underage brothel.....
Drunk drive down a one way street....
....Welcome to the Democratic Caucus (and/or the Kennedy Clan)
I can remember the one time that I was called for jury duty. I could hear my number being scratched off by the defense before I even sat down at the same time the saliva of the prosecutor was flooding the courtroom floor.
I was fortunate enough to have been involved in a knife fight (twas just a flesh wound) back when I was a wild colonial boy as the case involved a stabbing so I was immediately dismissed (with half a sawbuck in my pocket for my time)
It wouldn't have mattered anyways as anyone that's ever served knows its the riff raff that are unable or unwilling to get out of it. I know riff raff, riff raff was a good friend of mine, donkey you are no riff raff.
but....
The jury system is not flawed, the values system of America is flawed. Make a billion dollars in Hollywood and you're a hero, but don't you dare earn a million bucks on Wall Street because you must have did so at the expense of the poor and the oppressed you capitalist pig... now give it back so we can create a larger welfare state.
Scooter was found guilty because Tim Russert (a lib and a celeb) was found to have been more credible (of course he was, hes on TV). He was found guilty of having a bad memory. Now don't get me wrong. Scooter called Joe Wilson out, he intentionally emasculated him by pointing out that it was his wife that sent him to Niger for groceries. He did not blow Plame's cover as she was not a noc, nor was she in the past five years. Her role with the CIA was an open secret in Washington (and the cover of Vanity Fair) I will even go so far to admit that there's no doubt the orders came from the top, and that Cheney barked them... but once again no crime was committed.
Today's ruling was a travesty...but came as no great surprise. My legal advice to any conservative out there awaiting trial is simple; hire an agent, get some head shots taken and most importantly.... get thee to a reality show and register as a democrat.
EE-Aw!
Monday, March 05, 2007
Craicer Ass Craica
All this Coulter talk has made me recollect a conversation I had as a young eighteen year old lad while visiting my family in Derry.... The Town I Loved So Well, a song coincidentally written by the great Phil Coulter.I was at the pub McCourts just off of Ballybogie Road and yer man there (as I learned afterwards he knew my family by my face) came over to introduce himself and have a wee chat.
Here was the conversation...
Yer Man There: Right there mucker, hows the craic wit ye. care for a fag?
Me: (Well I didnt so much say anything as much as I punched him straight shot to the jowls)
Me uncles rushed over and broke up the donnybrook and asked why I knocked the old man out so I explained that he called me a fucking crackhead and wanted to get gay with me.
All punishable offenses in my mind.
They then explained that he was acknowledging me as a friend, asked me how things were, and would I care for one of his cigarettes.
...and that I should probably buy him a pint right quick before he got up and hit me with his home-made Blackthorn walking stick.
I did.
but too slow, so...
He did.
...and ended up making me one of his famous Blackthorn walking sticks that I keep in my golf bag to this day (its my fer fucks sake wedge) .
EE-Aw!
...and ended up making me one of his famous Blackthorn walking sticks that I keep in my golf bag to this day (its my fer fucks sake wedge) .
EE-Aw!
CPAC Are A Bundle Of Sticks
There is a movement on some conservative blogs condemning Ann Coulter's recent joke at CPAC that John Edwards is a faggot. In "An Open Letter to CPAC Sponsers and Organizers Regarding Ann Coulter" (sorry Jane we love ya, but we think you re wrong on this) currently making the rounds it is suggested that the "Age of Ann" has passed and that her voice should be censored from future CPAC events at the threat of a possible boycott.
This move reeks of fair weather pusillanimity and reminds me of a recent South Park episode where Isaac Hayes quit the show after they satirized scientology. The point Stone and Parker made was that Chef had no problem profiting from the show while they were making fun of others; and those familiar with the show understand just how cuttingly vulgar they could be -- but once they mocked something a little closer to home is when he became personally indignant and self-righteous.
Which can lead me to only one conclusion....
CPAC are a bunch of FAGGOTS!
Was her comment in bad taste? Yeah probably -- all the best jokes usually are.
But her point was valid. The idea that only words and slurs used against the left, minorities and the oppressed are hateful is bunk. Nazi is suddenly a term of endearment?
The idea that phony penance absolves liberals from past sins is bunk. Trent Lott is still a racist yet Robert Bird is a changed man of high moral fiber.
Her point was valid.
And it was funny.
This weak mindset is exactly the reason that conservatism is dying if not dead already. We have allowed the left to frame the argument, and as conservatives we are perennially on defense. We have become so frightened of being labelled as -phobes or -ists of any kind that we apologize for minuscule imaginary transgressions and shun the Constitution that we claim to hold so dear.
This false moral outrage has nothing to do with decency this is all about fear. Fear of addressing the issues, fear of being conservative. Generally speaking conservative Christians don't approve of homosexuality on religious grounds, whats wrong with that? Just as, generally speaking homosexuals don't approve of conservative Christians on political grounds. Only difference is that the 'mos are not afraid to vocalize said opposition.
Yes words do have meanings, but so do ideas and if we as conservatives continue to abandon ours to become more politically correct and telegenic for the morning shows then we have abandoned ourselves and The Culture War Patrick Buchanan spoke about in his 1992 Republican National Convention Speech is already lost.
If The Aurora stands alone on this and face being ostracised from the right, then so be it -- we will stand like a pint of Guinness in defense of Ann Coulter's First Amendment Right to tell truly tasteless jokes.
The Aurora
...as an aside, I'd be curious to know just how many of these shocked signatories of the Open Letter own an Ann Coulter book or have ever read her column. If they do or if they have... well then they ""shouldn't be surprised"".
EE-Aw!
... I had originally wrote ... ""go fuck themselves"", but in consideration of our friend Janes participation; I have chosen to tone it down a tad.
This move reeks of fair weather pusillanimity and reminds me of a recent South Park episode where Isaac Hayes quit the show after they satirized scientology. The point Stone and Parker made was that Chef had no problem profiting from the show while they were making fun of others; and those familiar with the show understand just how cuttingly vulgar they could be -- but once they mocked something a little closer to home is when he became personally indignant and self-righteous.
Which can lead me to only one conclusion....
CPAC are a bunch of FAGGOTS!
Was her comment in bad taste? Yeah probably -- all the best jokes usually are.
But her point was valid. The idea that only words and slurs used against the left, minorities and the oppressed are hateful is bunk. Nazi is suddenly a term of endearment?
The idea that phony penance absolves liberals from past sins is bunk. Trent Lott is still a racist yet Robert Bird is a changed man of high moral fiber.
Her point was valid.
And it was funny.
This weak mindset is exactly the reason that conservatism is dying if not dead already. We have allowed the left to frame the argument, and as conservatives we are perennially on defense. We have become so frightened of being labelled as -phobes or -ists of any kind that we apologize for minuscule imaginary transgressions and shun the Constitution that we claim to hold so dear.
This false moral outrage has nothing to do with decency this is all about fear. Fear of addressing the issues, fear of being conservative. Generally speaking conservative Christians don't approve of homosexuality on religious grounds, whats wrong with that? Just as, generally speaking homosexuals don't approve of conservative Christians on political grounds. Only difference is that the 'mos are not afraid to vocalize said opposition.
Yes words do have meanings, but so do ideas and if we as conservatives continue to abandon ours to become more politically correct and telegenic for the morning shows then we have abandoned ourselves and The Culture War Patrick Buchanan spoke about in his 1992 Republican National Convention Speech is already lost.
If The Aurora stands alone on this and face being ostracised from the right, then so be it -- we will stand like a pint of Guinness in defense of Ann Coulter's First Amendment Right to tell truly tasteless jokes.
The Aurora
...as an aside, I'd be curious to know just how many of these shocked signatories of the Open Letter own an Ann Coulter book or have ever read her column. If they do or if they have... well then they ""shouldn't be surprised"".
EE-Aw!
... I had originally wrote ... ""go fuck themselves"", but in consideration of our friend Janes participation; I have chosen to tone it down a tad.
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